Tag: church (Page 30 of 35)

Where Did They Go?

August 1, 2022 / / 0 Comments

I’ll be the first to admit it. It can be a tad irritating at times. Some people have seemingly fallen off the map in the past couple of years. I wonder frequently where did “so and so” go? But I wonder if that’s the best take on things…

So before I get too far into this, let me reassure you that this is in no way a slam on anyone who’s moved on. It’s not about any one person in particular actually. And this is not about the person who hasn’t reconnected yet either. This is about those who seem to focus more on the one(s) who’ve gone and not returned than we focus on the one(s) who are right there with us still.

I have the opportunity in my job to work with a lot of churches, but this doesn’t only apply to churches! One common thread in many of my conversations with pastors and church leaders revolves around those people who left during the uncertainty of the pandemic and just haven’t returned. It’s a condition that many institutions and groups are facing actually. Once active and heavily engaged individuals just disappearing without so much as an email, phone call or text message.

It’s hard to see this for anyone and even worse when some of these people who’ve just flat vanished are close friends. But I have a feeling our focus in this whole situation is a bit off.

I was talking with a church recently about this very issue. Where have they gone? Why are they not back yet? We need to get them to reconnect. How do we do attract them to come back again?

While I totally understand this way of thinking. And I’ve even thought it myself a few times, this is not the healthiest or even most beneficial way of thinking. I’m curious have we started to focus so much on the ones who are not back that we’ve disregarded the ones who are right there in front of us?

I fear the answer to this question is yes. I believe that our desire to have these missing faces back and re-engaged in the group has caused us to neglect and even ignore those who are willing, able and ready to serve.

Specifically to church leaders: if you want to re-engage those who’ve walked away start with the ones who are still involved. Get them excited about ministry. Share the work of the church with them. The Bible tells us that we’re supposed to equip the saints for works of ministry. But all too often we gather them together and make them watch us do ministry then complain when they leave because they’re bored.

In one of the many books I’ve read recently, I found a principle for moving an organization or group of people. I think it was in the book Tipping Point, but can’t be certain. The idea is basically that focusing on the late adopters (or those who’ve disconnected and refuse to reconnect) is fruitless, painful and exhausting. It yields very little by way of positive results. The author suggests to pour into the ones who are early to middle adopters, those who are right there already doing the work or at minimum watching it being done.

When these current workers and watchers get going and get excited, there will be a trickle down effect to the rest of the organization. So the long and short is that it’s not bad to miss those who’ve gone, but they can’t be the focus. If we focus on those who are right there with us even half as much as we do those who are gone, we’d be shocked how exciting life in any organization can truly be.

What’s Our Purpose?

July 25, 2022 / / 0 Comments

It’s really no secret what I do for a living. I’m a pastor of a church in a small town in north central Ohio. As a pastor I’ve seen many amazing and wonderful things, witnessed significant challenges, walked with people through some dark moments, sat with people in their sadness, challenged people when their witness and lifestyle weren’t matching one another and lost some friends in the process. But with all of these seemingly varied activities with the wide range of emotions attached to them, what are we really here to do anyway? What is the purpose for our calling?

As followers of Jesus, as churches, and as gatherings of Christians what is our end goal?

I feel that for many in this world, the end goal has shifted and we’ve started to major in the minors so to speak. This means that we’ve made a big deal out of little things and a lesser deal out of bigger things. What follows is my honest, heartfelt assessment of some of the things we are missing the point on altogether.

One of my favorite things that Jesus never said but we pretend he did is spur one another on toward perfect attendance and passive observation.

When speaking of why the church exists and what we’re supposed to do as we gather, the Bible teaches that we’re to spur one another on toward love and good works not worship attendance. Jesus is far more concerned with how we live out what we say than he is how often we sit in our assigned seat at church. But for so many churches it seems as if we care more about how many are seated and less about how many are sent (more on that later).

The emphasis of the church should be to equip the saints, that’s the believers gathered, for works of service. But how often does that really happen? When we care more about attendance than actual participation and ownership of ministry life, we do a grave disservice to the gospel. If we’re truly supposed to spur one another on toward love and good works and to equip one another for works of service, then we have a long way to go.

These things really don’t take place in the corporate worship setting. Now, as I say often, don’t get your undies in a bunch! I am in NO way saying to throw corporate worship out the window. What I am saying is that we can’t put all of our proverbial eggs in the worship basket. And that seems exactly what the church is doing more and more of lately. So shifting our thinking from mere gathering to actually engaging in works of ministry together is critical as we move through some unsettled times in church history. But how do we do that?

One of those silly church cliches is that we need to focus more on sending capacity and less on seating capacity. But no matter how cheesy that is, there is massive truth in it! The more we focus on numbers in worship and who’s here and who isn’t here, the less we see what Jesus really called us to be. And the less we see what he is already doing in our midst.

Now don’t use this as a license to not participate in worship! The Bible also says that we should want to come and worship. We should not neglect coming together! As a matter of fact the more we grow in our service and sending natures, the more powerful our desire to be in worship. And the more we really are present in worship, the more desire we have to be serving and being sent. It’s a cool cycle where one feeds the other. Not being a part of a worship gathering is the result of not being sold out on the heart of being a follower of Jesus. And not allowing yourself to be sent out is a result of not being transformed by the message of Scripture.

We must have both and approach to ministry together. We need to meet together. So invite one another to join for worship, bible study, small groups, fellowship gatherings, outings of all sorts! But don’t stop there…take those worship moments, bible study or small groups and do acts of service. Encourage one another in how they serve. Move one another out of their comfort zones to do something significant in someone’s life that forces them to rely on God.

What’s our purpose? Sure our purpose is to worship, but it’s so much more than that. If all we do is worship, we miss a huge part of what it means to be the body of Christ! If all we do is serve, we miss what it means to find real rest and healing at the feet of Jesus. We need both!

The Missing Generation?

July 21, 2022 / / 0 Comments

So there’s this thing that’s making the rounds in the church world that there is a whole generation of young people that are missing out on something in the church. I think that’s kind of bogus, but I guess you can believe what you want on that topic. If you stick around for a few minutes here I’d like to explain why I think this metric is bunk and what we can do to change the perception a bit.

For starters I wonder if we’re looking at things wrongly? I mean what qualifies a missing generation? Does it mean no one from that generation is at all engaged? Does it mean they’re not in worship? Has this generation told us they want nothing to do with us? And really the important question in my mind is are they really missing or are we just missing them?

You see the problem, as I see it, isn’t that they’re missing. These high school, college and post college young people aren’t necessarily absent from the ways of Jesus. They’re just not in our buildings the way we would hope. They don’t function like previous generations functioned. But is that really a bad thing?

I’ve talked in many settings before about our metrics being off and measuring things that really aren’t the best sets of measurements. What if we’re seeing an entire generation actually care more about doing the things of Jesus instead of sitting around and only learning about the ways of Jesus?

What I’ve experienced in my context is that these younger generations aren’t really all that caught up in sitting for 60-75 minutes to hear someone spout off cool ideals about Jesus only to go home. And the way our current system is designed, that’s pretty much what a Sunday morning feels like to some. The congregation is for the majority passively observing. There’s little room for engagement around the truths of Jesus. Then we send people home to figure it out or live your life so you can come back next week for another shot in the arm of our tradition and teachings.

Can we shift our focus? Is it possible to remain true to our understanding of the Bible along with our confessional practices and move from doing ministry to this generation to doing ministry with this generation. It’s all about including them in the works of ministry. And yes it’s actually biblical!

The idea that we are to curate believers who passively sit and watch a show on a Sunday is not only off-putting but frankly it has no grounding in scripture whatsoever! The early church was dynamic and moving. It was about gathering to learn and grow and be challenged just as much as it was about going out to love and serve and give to our neighbors in need. We talk a big game but when it comes to actually putting our boots on the ground, we get a little lazy to put it mildly.

I really believe we need to shift our thinking from merely counting people in attendance to including them in acts of ministry for the sake of the world around us. When we do this, we’ll realize that this generation is not lost after-all. As a matter of fact, they’re likely doing this stuff without us at best. But even at worst they’re sitting back waiting for us to do something of some relevance to the people we say we are to love in Jesus’ name.

Now don’t get all freaked out about the word relevance. The gospel is relevant. Jesus is relevant. Nothing we can do will change that at all. But the church as an institution and even as a people have become less relevant because it sure appears all we care about sometimes are boards, budgets and butts in seats.

You want to find the lost generation? Do something that serves, loves and gives to the marginalized in your community and you’re guaranteed to find them, hiding in plain sight, where we’ve refused to look.

Moving The Sticks

June 7, 2022 / / 0 Comments

I’m one of those people who thinks in pictures. So you say cookie and I picture a homemade chocolate chip cookie. You say truck and I picture the truck I currently drive, no matter what exact truck you’re referring to! Knowing how my mind works, I thought I’d share some things to consider when we talk about discipleship and why we do it.

The image in my head…

I love football. Not the whole national, professional kind of football but what I consider the good old college kind of hard hitting, forcing the ball down the field kind of football. There are a few things about football that just about everyone knows. There are lines that mark what is in bounds and what is out of bounds. There is a goal line. There are hash marks to help position the ball on the field and to help each team know how far they need to go in order to move the sticks. This is what some people call getting a first down. If you’re not a football fan, I’m sorry this illustration will likely be lost on you.

How do we move the sticks in the Christian church? Now I’m not talking about the institutional church that revolves around a building with a steeple and an hour or so once a week. The church to which I’m referring consists of the people who together have one confession of faith. The church is less the thing we do and more the people we are. It is less a time or space and more an act of gathering and doing life together.

With this understanding of church, how do we move the sticks? How do we know when we’re doing what we’re called to do? The illustration of moving the sticks is about moving forward and going in the right direction. How do we know if the church is moving in the right direction? And making any kind of positive progress while doing it?

Simply put the church that moves in the right direction will be making disciples. They will have proper worship and will do the things that are marks of the church. But the forward momentum of the church isn’t measured in worship, attendance, giving, or many of the butts in the seats kind of measures we typically use. According to the Bible, the forward momentum of the church is measured by how disciples are made.

This is why discipleship is so very important in the life of the church. If churches are not making disciples, then they’re not doing the one thing Jesus told us to be doing. I think we stop making disciples because we have a hard time measuring what a disciple is. We don’t have a 12 step program for making disciples. So we tend to measure things that we can measure like worship attendance and how strictly one adheres to a set standard of tradition. But moving the sticks as a church, so to speak, happens when we help people move from mere observers in their faith lives to men and women who own their faith.

Moving the sticks for the church isn’t about growing a local church or even enlarging the church budget, but it’s about working with men and women who believe in Jesus. It’s about helping them see the depth and breadth and width of Jesus’ love for them in their everyday lives.

The end goal stays the same, living in eternity with Jesus. But the markers along the road as we get there are the making of disciples. We took time to define what a disciple is here. And how disciples gather here. One of the keys to achieving anything is knowing you’re on the right track. And that happens best by checking your progress against some form of measuring stick. As institutional churches live out their calling of teaching and preaching the truth of Jesus, administering the sacraments rightly and gathering for public worship that glorifies God, we are called to do something bigger and more impactful for the men and women who gather in our buildings.

Discipleship isn’t a fad or a good idea. It’s actually what God commanded in the Bible. Jesus even gives us a great picture of what discipleship looks like. Discipleship is not a program that we funnel everyone through. We’ll discuss the fallacy of discipleship funnel in a future post, but for now this is not a time to create a program or add a staff person. Discipleship is critical because it’s the way Jesus grew His ministry. It’s critical because He commanded it. It’s critical because it’s the way Jesus continues to bless highly.

Long and short, the best way to move the sticks and measure our advancement as churches in the world isn’t found in more people in worship or larger budgets or additional programs. The way we move the sticks is by making disciples who make disciples.

Four Parts To An Effective Gathering

May 24, 2022 / / 0 Comments

The last time we got together we discussed two key steps for making disciples along with a critical definition. You can find more details on those here, but the point is to read the bible daily and meet weekly with your triad to break down what you’ve read. It’s really that simple. Now there are undoubtedly some questions about what one of these triad things looks like and what you do when you get together. Again don’t complicate this thing!

In the church we tend to make everything into a program that has rules and boundaries and set times and set curriculum and all the things. One of the beauties of discipleship triads is that they are simple, straightforward, anyone can do them, and they don’t require a lot of resources or training. They’re also extremely reproducible, which is an absolute must. You can do this as a pastor or a church member. You can do these in a church of 50,000 or 50! It doesn’t matter how big or small or how much formal education you have because the Bible is our text book and the Holy Spirit is our teacher. We have all we need!

I have a friend named Brian who used to say how much do you need to know to share the Jesus that you know. The idea is that you already have all you need as soon as you open the bible! It’s all about knowing Jesus more fully and intimately. You don’t need a study guide or the use of the church building. You don’t need a degree or a set of hard and fast questions. All you need is the Bible and a couple of friends and you’re off!

Community Building

So what do these groups look like? They look like a group of men or women who genuinely care about each other and their spiritual well being. So take the first bit of time when you connect in your weekly gatherings, that I call a huddle, to get to know what’s going on. Just catch up a little because a lot can happen in a week.

Ok so I call these things huddles because it’s kind of like the offense getting together before snapping the ball to make sure they’re on the same page. These weekly gatherings, not a substitute for or part of a worship service, are where we gather our team to get on the right page. So start by catching up on how the week has been. All the normal conversation things.

Good questions to consider here are:

  • What are your highs? Lows?
  • What are your prayer needs today?
  • What are you really struggling with in life this week?
  • What success has come in your life since we were together last?
  • What in your life is worthy of praising God for right now?

Biblical Equipping

This portion is taking the Bible and opening it up to see what’s inside. You’ll go through your reading that you did apart this week and see what God was up to. The point of Biblical equipping is to do more than just read a paragraph but to interact with it on a personal level. There are no set questions needed for this section but I’ll give you a few to consider. You’re not looking for deep notes on translations and all that but simply what is God saying? What are you hearing? Here are two methods I find helpful when interacting with a section of the Bible:

SOAP – this uses the word as an acronym for Scripture, Observation, Application, Prayer

  • What section of the Bible are you referring to? Write the verse, sentence or even a couple of words down.
  • What was happening in the text? What did the original hearers of this message get from it?
  • What does this mean for me today? Why should I even care about this in my life right now?
  • What prayer has God laid on my heart after reading this passage?

Observe…Investigate…Apply – this uses three sets of questions that can be used for any Bible reading and are aimed at helping us dive deeper into a better understanding of what God has in store for us in each section of the Bible.

Observe
  • What’s going on in this passage?
  • Who’s talking? Who’s listening?
  • What are the important words, people, or ideas?
  • What is my first impression of the passage?
Investigate
  • What can I discover about God?
  • What questions would I like to ask God about this passage?
  • What can I discover about myself?
  • What can I learn about God’s picture of a healthy spiritual life?
  • What can I do to encourage or discourage this health?
Apply
  • What is one take-away truth that the Holy Spirit would like me to think about today?
  • How would God like to change my life if I applied this passage?
  • What’s one specific and practical way I could respond to this passage in the next 24-48 hours?

Pray For Each Other

One really important part of these triad groups is that you all pray for one another. You have to resist the fear that you won’t have the right words. This prayer isn’t about sounding all churchy. It’s about caring for those in the triad and addressing the concerns they already mentioned.

Think of prayer as a conversation where you talk and lay out your thanks and concerns then spend the rest of the week listening to the answers that are all around you. Keep the prayer short if needed. Don’t worry about fancy phrases or sounding like you have something pre-written for you to read. A good acronym for you is the word pray – praise, repent, ask, yield. Thank him for what he’s done. Admit where we’ve failed. Ask for help. Then yield for answers.

Accountability Is Key

Finally, each time you get together you have to make sure you have next steps. How are you going to take what you talked about today and put it into practice? This is laying out the mission in front of you all and then holding each other accountable for reaching it. The more you meet, the more this will help in your catch up time at the beginning of the next meeting.

You can still start by asking about the kids or wife or work but having something to hold one another accountable for is a great asset in transitioning to the new topic for the day. This will also give you things to pray for throughout the week apart.

So the key here isn’t to make things challenging. It’s actually about leaving the structure wide open to make it easier to adjust based on life circumstances. The point is to have the bible as a daily rhythm for life and a group of 2-3 of you who meet regular to huddle your way through next steps of applying what you believe.

Mission Driven Metrics

May 12, 2022 / / 0 Comments

For decades the church has done a relatively decent job at measuring the things that are measurable. Things like church attendance, Sunday School attendance, offerings are the typical measures for a local congregation. But is there a better metric? Is there a metric that better aligns with the present reality of the church life in which we currently exist?

To start with, I want to be clear, that measuring things like attendance and offerings is not a bad thing. As a matter of fact they give us a baseline view of the church. Is the church growing numerically? Are we slowly dying and need to figure out why? So by all means, measure these things. But don’t stop here. There is so much more that we need to be about as churches and this is just the surface.

Are we asking how people are sharing their faith?

Part of the life and ministry of any local church should be built around the idea of sharing stories of faith. If we’re not sharing our faith stories, then how will others know who we are and why we exist? One of the powerhouse metrics is the simple question: with whom have you shared your faith this week?

I know this question seems like an intangible type of metric. It doesn’t measure someone coming through your doors or giving to the mission of the congregation financially, but it measures how much someone buys into the mission by sharing it with someone else.

Do people live differently?

The bible teaches that a follower of Christ is one who is transformed by the renewing of our minds in Christ. This means that we need to look and act different than the world. So how are people in the local church context behaving differently? How are they showing signs of spiritual maturity? What are the men and women of the local church doing that demonstrate their close relationship with Jesus?

In the congregation I am honored to serve, we have a pathway or cycle that we use to measure this kind of life change. We call it our discipleship pathway. I’ve talked about this in other posts but here’s a quick 30,000 foot view of the way we measure and why it works for us. Quick note – do not just copy someone else’s activities or even metrics without knowing why they do it and why it works for them.

Our discipleship pathway is a circle that is constantly repeated and never ending. Kind of like a wheel on a bicycle that spins over and over and over. This is what we’re looking for in the life of followers of Jesus. The wheel has four key quadrants kind of like a pie. These quadrants are worship, grow, serve, and invite. And each of them represent a different way in which people engage in the life of the local church.

Worship is pretty much what you’d expect. It’s engaging in the Sunday morning (or whatever day you worship) experience. It’s going to worship, singing songs, hearing the message, being with others. These are lifelong followers of Jesus and those new to the faith. This number fluctuates based on time of year, cultural norms and key events in people’s lives. This is the attendance number that most churches measure. It’s a good number! But we can’t stop here.

We use the attendance or worship number as a baseline. You see when this number increases, the other numbers should increase in like manner, which brings me to the second stop in our Discipleship Pathway: grow.

Grow is representative of all the public gatherings of people around matters of faith. So for this number we watch Sunday morning Bible class, small groups, and any other gathering of people within the congregation. The point is when the worship numbers increase this number should rise at an equal rate. If these numbers don’t move together, then we have a spiritual health problem.

So measuring the measurables is really important! But we have to look at the whole picture. The point of discipleship is not just about worship. If, as pastors or church leaders, we only measure worship then we’re missing the boat of growing people in Christ. And we’re selling the Christian life drastically short. When I look out at the congregation on a Sunday, it is exciting to see new faces in worship. But even more exciting yet is when I see those same new faces join us for some Bible class or small group activity. Whether it’s an in-person gathering or a virtual one, welcoming new faces into more than just worship is critical to the overall health and vibrancy of a congregation.

Serve is exactly what is sounds like but maybe not where or how you’d think. The next step in the spiritual maturity and overall health of a congregation is breaking the 80/20 rule. I’m sure you’ve heard that in any organization, churches not excluded, 20% of the people do 80% of the work. Well this measure of health addresses this very problem. When a church is healthy and vibrant and the people of the church are spiritually growing and mature, there will be a plethora of servants available to pull off key tasks and start new ministries.

So how this works in our pathway of discipleship is pretty simple. Just like the grow quadrant, when worship increases and participation in grow activities increase those serving in a variety of places in the life of the church should increase at an equal rate. If people aren’t getting involved in acts of service inside the church structure, then you’re starting to notice signs of a consumer driven church and this is not healthy.

Invite is the old evangelism idea with a little twist. In traditional evangelism the idea is just getting someone to go to church. While this is not bad by any stretch of the imagination, it lacks personal relationship. And relationship is critical to what we’re called to be about as Christians. The point here is that we invite people to join us on the very same journey we’ve been on for a time.

When we invite people to come along with us, it keeps us accountable and shows that we have an ownership of the ministry to which we’ve become attached.

There’s no golden ticket on how to measure things in ministry. But the key is we can’t just stop at the easy stuff. Spiritual growth and discipleship are far more than Sunday morning worship. And our metrics need to be about more than butts in seats and bucks in the budget!

Are You Trapped?

April 15, 2022 / / 0 Comments

One of my biggest fears in life is being trapped and have no way out. I don’t like water because I’m a tad afraid of getting trapped below the water. I know it’s one of those irrational kind of fears, but it’s a real fear for me. I don’t care for enclosed spaces and the idea of suffocating freaks the heck out of me. I do not like to feel trapped.

But it’s not just trapped under water or in a small space that is an uncomfortable feeling for many people. The idea of being trapped in a decision or a job or a relationship or a guilty feeling or an addiction are less than appealing thoughts as well.

Imagine for a moment being held against your will. You’re forced to work and treated like something less than human. You aren’t praised for going above and beyond. You’re barely paid enough to live a decent life. You don’t make an honest wage. You’re tired. You’re scared. It’s just not a good place. The dark nights seem darker. The hot summer days feel scorchingly hot. The cold winter nights freeze you to the core. Trapped in this kind of life is a place no one wants to be.

Now imagine that into this trapped life comes someone you’ve never met. He comes in and in a powerful display of force suppresses your captor. He frees you. He takes your kidnapper and restrains him so that you can go free. But you have to make a decision.

Will you stay with your captor or will you go free?

This decision may seem like an easy one for you and me right now. It might seem like a no brainer. But it seems all too often that we tend to choose our captivity over our freedom. Even though it sucks being stuck in the bad moments and trapped in our guilt or addiction or depression, there’s something comforting about the familiar. We like to stay in situations that we know, even if they they’re bad situations.

What do you need to be freed from? What comfortable sucky situation do you keep going back to simply because it’s known to you?

We all do this, in probably more ways than we realize. But the truth of the matter is we need to be ok walking away from the things that trap us. We need to be willing to close doors that aren’t beneficial, healthy or profitable even if it means saying goodbye to someone or something that at one point was meaningful to us.

This will post on the Thursday before Easter. It’s a day that really celebrates freedom from things that trap us. The events of this day in history were a reminder to the people who follow Jesus to flee the things that trap and run toward the freeing presence of a relationship with Jesus. The bread and the wine are reminders of all that Jesus did to forgive us and set us free from the strongest captor we’ve ever encountered.

What holds you today? It’s time to let those things go and rest in the freedom that’s been won for you.

Things Aren’t Always As They Seem

April 11, 2022 / / 0 Comments

Growing up in the church world I was taught about good and bad, God and Satan, heaven and hell. We even had some of those not so greatly illustrated kids books about these topics. One image that always stuck out at me was the one of the devil, Satan. I don’t know about you but growing up I always thought of the devil as being red with horns and a pitchfork. I remember thinking why would anyone want to follow after something that told you it was going to hurt you? Why would anyone want that?

But over time I dug into the Bible for myself and started to realize that the kid’s version of these images wasn’t exactly correct. You see if they were, then very few people who really follow something like that. As a matter of fact, I started to realize that the devil’s goal might not be what I always thought it was either.

If you’re anything like me, you probably have had this notion that Satan wants us to worship him. Like he’s building a fan club or something. But what if that wasn’t his goal? What if his goal was much simpler than that? What if he didn’t care about our allegiance to him at all? What if I told you that we all have a little Satan worship in us?

Now for those of you died in the wool, church going types, you’re likely shaking your head thinking I’m off my rocker. And while I might be a little nutty, if you stick with me for a few minutes I’ll explain my thought process here. You see I don’t really think Satan cares who we follow or to whom we pledge our allegiance as long as it’s not Jesus. In other words, Satan is just trying to distract us from the only way to salvation. He hates all things Jesus so much that he’ll be glad if we follow anyone, anything as long as it’s not Jesus.

Still not convinced? Ok so think about the last time you sat down to read your bible or do a little quiet time in prayer. What happened? Did you get distracted? Did you think about the plans for the day? Or maybe where you want to go on vacation this summer? What about that noise you don’t remember hearing before that you just can’t seem to ignore? What about that funny feeling in your stomach? Are you hungry? Why are you so tired?

Am I onto something here? We sit down to do anything that draws our heart closer to Jesus and all hell breaks loose in our minds. We can’t stay focus for anything. And that’s just what Satan wants. He’s no idiot. Actually, he’s pretty darn smart. He knows that Jesus is the only way. He knows there’s no plan B when it comes to salvation. So all he has to do is to get us to look the other way. Anything else is fine as long as it’s not Jesus.

The goal then is to make us sit idly by and do nothing. He wants us to just let the world spin around us and keep us so focused on the pace of life, the hurry in our schedules, our wants, our desires, our passions, our…anything. As long as we’re not focused on Jesus. As long as we’re just sitting in neutral in life, Satan wins. Neutral is no good. Neutral means we’re not committed. Neutral makes us just as easily moved away from Jesus as toward him. The Bible even tells us to be hot for him or cold against him but none of this lukewarm, neutral, stuff. Neutral gets us in a really bad way in Christian life.

So the long and short is to make a decision right here, right now. Whom will you follow? Will it be Jesus? Or will it be anything else? There’s only one way and his name is Jesus. Nothing else will work. Nothing else will do. Nothing else will even come close.

I love the verse from Joshua 24 that says choose this day whom you will serve. How about it? Whom are you going to serve? God chose you in Jesus before the foundations of the world. Today he asks you to follow his lead and choose him.

Grief Sucks

March 22, 2022 / / 0 Comments

We’ve all experienced it. We’ve all seen it. Felt it. Went through it. We’ve all had the taste of loss put in our mouths. Maybe the loss of a loved one to cancer. Maybe it was the loss of a job. Maybe we didn’t get the promotion and feel as if we lost out on something big. Maybe it’s the feeling of loss we have when a child moves out of the house. Maybe it’s the loss of a friend or even a spouse. All of these losses cause us to go through a time of grief. And to put it mildly, grief sucks.

Grief sucks because it’s hard. Grief is hard because there’s no clear cut path to make our way through it. And when we’re in an uncomfortable place, our number one priority is to get through it. We don’t want to be in a challenging situation any longer than is absolutely necessary. Grief is no different.

Everything around us tells us that we need to get over our grief. Sure people don’t say that but when you listen to their words, it’s pretty evident. We don’t like being around crying people because we don’t know what to say or do. So we try to give some feel good platitude that makes us feel like we’re doing something, but it really isn’t helpful in the least to the person grieving.

Grief is hard because it’s like quicksand. When we fall into grief, the more we resist it the more it sucks us right into its awful grasp. We become so tunnel visioned on the loss and the pain associated with it, that we can’t see anything positive around us at all.

Grief is suffered in moments, but is meant to be lived out in stories.

Think about it for a minute. The last time you were in a place of grief, what was your focus? It was the loss and only the loss. We become so tunnel visioned that we can’t see beyond the loss and the feelings of pain and abandonment associated with grief. It’s as if grief is all that’s left in life. But grief isn’t the end of the story, at least it doesn’t have to be.

When we realize that grief is acceptable and that there are stages of grief that allow us to move through it and not get trapped in the middle of it, we can soon see the power of baby steps. First of all, don’t hear what I’m not saying here. Grief is not something you need to get over. But you do need to move through. We all need to make progress walking through the darkness and loneliness of grief but we don’t do it alone.

As a pastor, I look at life a little different than some. I believe that grief has a very important purpose in our lives. Grief is a way to check ourselves on what’s important. Grief helps us see who and what is around us to walk with us through challenge. Grief, although awful, doesn’t get the final word.

I’ve suffered some pretty significant losses in life. From losing two grandparents in less than a year, to losing close friends, having to close a church and leave the people behind that I loved dearly. Loss is hard. It sucks to be honest. But grief is part of a story that is being written, but it doesn’t have to be the final chapter.

Another way to look at grief is to not let it have the final word. When we keep staring our loss in the face, day in and day out, we’re letting the pain and loss and grief consume us. The moment is becoming the story. It’s as if grief is getting to put a period, hard stop at the end of our joy. But that’s not healthy and it’s not even true!

Grief isn’t a period. It’s a comma. The purpose of a period is to show an ending. The purpose of a comma is to help you pivot to a new line of thought taking into account what just happened. This means that the loss you are experiencing right now can lead you to something next that could only be experienced with the taste of grief in your mouth. I know that’s hard to swallow because we just want it to end, but that’s not how grief works.

Grief has to run its course. For some it’s days. For others it takes months or even years. You’ll never get over the loss. But you’ll grow through the grief. The point is simple. Don’t let grief have the final say. Don’t let grief be a period where God intends a comma. Don’t let the moments of grief prevent you from experiencing the fullness of the story of your life. Grief sucks, but it’s not the end of your story.

Please note: if you are suffering from a loss and feel massive burdens of anxiety and depression, I would encourage you to find a professional to help you. There is absolutely nothing wrong with talking to someone who can help you process the grief and find healthy tools to aide in coping with the weight of grief. You’re not in this alone.

Welcome to the Table

March 21, 2022 / / 0 Comments

My family has a tradition that formed several years ago. Once a month we gather for a family dinner. I think it started when we all kind of had established lives that took us in a variety of directions. Being from a larger family where everyone is busy with work and other functions of life, it’s hard to be together on a daily basis. And my parents didn’t want us to drift apart as a family. Hence family dinner.

I will admit sometimes those family dinners roll around and it’s just hard to make the time. Maybe it’s my schedule that’s too full or the fact that I rarely have a weekend free or I just don’t want to make the drive? But whatever it is sometimes it takes a little effort to get me out the door to one of these gatherings. Now before anyone (yes even you mom and dad) get upset or hurt by this hear me out.

It’s always worth it. Yes I said it. Giving up what I want to go to one of these family gatherings is always worth it. Even if I don’t get the living room painted or the lawn mowed or the you fill in the blank. It’s always worth it. But why? The purpose of coming to one of these family dinners is to keep us connected and enjoy the feast that’s been prepared.

Ok buckle up because we’re about to take a bit of a turn to hit a parallel road.

This is a lot like gathering for worship. We often don’t want to attend because well there are many things we could be doing instead. Things like sleeping for instance. Or maybe taking a slow morning for a good hearty breakfast. Or heading out for a calm, quiet Sunday walk around the park. Whatever it is, there are a million things that we could be doing on a Sunday. But we’ll never know what we’re missing until we show up.

So are you still with me here? Family dinner is like regularly gathering for worship. No we don’t worship our families or even have a worship service at a family dinner, but there’s a lot that happens when we gather with family that should resemble worship and vice versa.

If your worship experience isn’t like one of those family gatherings, then maybe you need to rethink what worship really is. And yes I know comparing a worship gathering to a family gathering is dangerous because every family has one of those people. Some people can’t stand gathering with family because they don’t really enjoy being near those people. That’s a shame for starters, but I really think life in the church is the same way. There are those people who say things without thinking, come across a little harsh, are just too loud, seem stuck on themselves, are just kind of annoying, and the list goes on.

But why do we gather? We don’t gather for family gatherings or a time of worship because we like everyone in the room. We do it because we’re a family and better together than apart. If we can’t handle the hard times of being a family then we really need to check our own hearts but that’s a post for a different time. So putting aside what I want for the sake of the gathering just might be worth it. You should try it!

Another similarity between these family dinners and worship is the meal. It’s great to sit down and feast on the meal. But one of the cool parts about gathering as a family is that often it’s not the parents who get the food for their kids. It’s one of the uncles or aunts. We kind of share the responsibility of preparing the plates of food. But everyone feeds themselves.

Think about it for a minute. How cool would it be if every person in church thought of it as their responsibility and even privilege to help everyone else grow in their faith! I love helping my nieces fill their plates as they get their food. (I don’t have young nephews on my side of the family or I’d help them too.) Could you imagine what the church would look like if men and women would share what they were learning with other people throughout the church, both young and old? Could you imagine how different things would be if not only the pastor was the one doing the teaching but every person who was growing in Christ found it their responsibility to ensure the Bible was taught and shared?

Sure someone has to prepare the meal. Sure someone has to make sure the pantry is stocked and the table is set. But when it all comes down to it, even my young nieces are able to pick up their utensils and feed themselves. They feed themselves the very food that we put on their plates. They feast on the meal that was prepared.

The long and short is this. Make time to gather most certainly with your family but also with your church family. Give up a little bit of you for the sake of those who haven’t seen you in a while. Help those around you navigate the food on the table. Show them the menu. Serve them the food. Then feast. Feast on the meal that’s been prepared. Enjoy the fellowship around the table while you fill yourself with all that’s been set before you.

Welcome to the table. It’s time to feast.

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