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Tag: discipleship (Page 15 of 23)

Mission Driven Metrics

May 12, 2022 / / 0 Comments

For decades the church has done a relatively decent job at measuring the things that are measurable. Things like church attendance, Sunday School attendance, offerings are the typical measures for a local congregation. But is there a better metric? Is there a metric that better aligns with the present reality of the church life in which we currently exist?

To start with, I want to be clear, that measuring things like attendance and offerings is not a bad thing. As a matter of fact they give us a baseline view of the church. Is the church growing numerically? Are we slowly dying and need to figure out why? So by all means, measure these things. But don’t stop here. There is so much more that we need to be about as churches and this is just the surface.

Are we asking how people are sharing their faith?

Part of the life and ministry of any local church should be built around the idea of sharing stories of faith. If we’re not sharing our faith stories, then how will others know who we are and why we exist? One of the powerhouse metrics is the simple question: with whom have you shared your faith this week?

I know this question seems like an intangible type of metric. It doesn’t measure someone coming through your doors or giving to the mission of the congregation financially, but it measures how much someone buys into the mission by sharing it with someone else.

Do people live differently?

The bible teaches that a follower of Christ is one who is transformed by the renewing of our minds in Christ. This means that we need to look and act different than the world. So how are people in the local church context behaving differently? How are they showing signs of spiritual maturity? What are the men and women of the local church doing that demonstrate their close relationship with Jesus?

In the congregation I am honored to serve, we have a pathway or cycle that we use to measure this kind of life change. We call it our discipleship pathway. I’ve talked about this in other posts but here’s a quick 30,000 foot view of the way we measure and why it works for us. Quick note – do not just copy someone else’s activities or even metrics without knowing why they do it and why it works for them.

Our discipleship pathway is a circle that is constantly repeated and never ending. Kind of like a wheel on a bicycle that spins over and over and over. This is what we’re looking for in the life of followers of Jesus. The wheel has four key quadrants kind of like a pie. These quadrants are worship, grow, serve, and invite. And each of them represent a different way in which people engage in the life of the local church.

Worship is pretty much what you’d expect. It’s engaging in the Sunday morning (or whatever day you worship) experience. It’s going to worship, singing songs, hearing the message, being with others. These are lifelong followers of Jesus and those new to the faith. This number fluctuates based on time of year, cultural norms and key events in people’s lives. This is the attendance number that most churches measure. It’s a good number! But we can’t stop here.

We use the attendance or worship number as a baseline. You see when this number increases, the other numbers should increase in like manner, which brings me to the second stop in our Discipleship Pathway: grow.

Grow is representative of all the public gatherings of people around matters of faith. So for this number we watch Sunday morning Bible class, small groups, and any other gathering of people within the congregation. The point is when the worship numbers increase this number should rise at an equal rate. If these numbers don’t move together, then we have a spiritual health problem.

So measuring the measurables is really important! But we have to look at the whole picture. The point of discipleship is not just about worship. If, as pastors or church leaders, we only measure worship then we’re missing the boat of growing people in Christ. And we’re selling the Christian life drastically short. When I look out at the congregation on a Sunday, it is exciting to see new faces in worship. But even more exciting yet is when I see those same new faces join us for some Bible class or small group activity. Whether it’s an in-person gathering or a virtual one, welcoming new faces into more than just worship is critical to the overall health and vibrancy of a congregation.

Serve is exactly what is sounds like but maybe not where or how you’d think. The next step in the spiritual maturity and overall health of a congregation is breaking the 80/20 rule. I’m sure you’ve heard that in any organization, churches not excluded, 20% of the people do 80% of the work. Well this measure of health addresses this very problem. When a church is healthy and vibrant and the people of the church are spiritually growing and mature, there will be a plethora of servants available to pull off key tasks and start new ministries.

So how this works in our pathway of discipleship is pretty simple. Just like the grow quadrant, when worship increases and participation in grow activities increase those serving in a variety of places in the life of the church should increase at an equal rate. If people aren’t getting involved in acts of service inside the church structure, then you’re starting to notice signs of a consumer driven church and this is not healthy.

Invite is the old evangelism idea with a little twist. In traditional evangelism the idea is just getting someone to go to church. While this is not bad by any stretch of the imagination, it lacks personal relationship. And relationship is critical to what we’re called to be about as Christians. The point here is that we invite people to join us on the very same journey we’ve been on for a time.

When we invite people to come along with us, it keeps us accountable and shows that we have an ownership of the ministry to which we’ve become attached.

There’s no golden ticket on how to measure things in ministry. But the key is we can’t just stop at the easy stuff. Spiritual growth and discipleship are far more than Sunday morning worship. And our metrics need to be about more than butts in seats and bucks in the budget!

Learn To Fail

May 5, 2022 / / 0 Comments

No one likes to fail. Well, I’m pretty sure no one does, but I guess there could be that rogue person who just longs to fail at everything they do. Still failing isn’t really all that fun. But, oddly enough, I’m a huge advocate for teaching people how to fail because I firmly believe that failure is the best teacher.

In a former life I was a church planter. That pretty much is a person who desires to see a church started in a given area so they start it from just a seed of a few people. There’s no land, not much money, no formalized group of people, and often not even a building. The goal is over time to build a team to help you build relationships and start a church. Well, as I was building my team to start this would be church, one of the first questions I’d ask people was are you willing to fail.

If a person isn’t willing to fail then they’re sure to never succeed.

I firmly believe if we don’t have a willingness to fail, fear will creep in to the point where we won’t ever really accomplish the things we’re setting out to accomplish. In other words, fear of failing will seize us from taking the necessary risks needed to move forward. This is true on so many levels in our personal and professional lives.

If we are afraid of dropping a weight on ourselves while weight lifting, then we won’t stretch ourselves to lift heavy. If we’re unwilling to fail in a race then we won’t ever run. If we’re not willing to miss out on the promotion, then we likely won’t even apply for the job. There are so many places where failure is critical for success! I know that sounds like a contradiction but think about it.

Ever hear of WD-40? Most people know that it stands for Water Displacer. But the 40 is often lost. It represents the 40th try before getting it right. That means he failed 39 times before coming up with the product he was really trying to make. Thirty-nine failures? Most people would have given up after the third failed attempt. But 39?!?!

You see failure, while it doesn’t teach us the right answer, it always narrows down the field of possibilities. Every failure shows us what not to do. The issue is that most of us don’t research our failures closely enough to find out why they failed.

I have failed more times than I can even count! I know that each failure gets me closer to the real answer. Our system in life doesn’t really allow for failure in many places in life but I think a good leader will give his/her people the freedom to fail. When we teach people how to fail, we truly empower them to succeed.

One last illustration on failure. I can remember vividly learning how to ride a bicycle. I did the training wheel thing for a time but eventually I needed to learn how to balance without those extra (ugly) wheel additions. So my dad held my bike and ran with me as long as he could. But eventually he had to let go. In letting go he enabled me to fail. He was pretty sure that I’d fall but it was in falling off my bike that I learned how important balance really was. If I didn’t fall off my bike (read fail), then I would never have realized how important it is to not look behind you constantly to see if your dad is still holding the seat.

Failure is critical to any area of success. Until we’re able to embrace the failures in life, we’ll never experience the true success of which we’re capable.

On A Mission

April 20, 2022 / / 0 Comments

Have you ever seen someone walk with authority? Or listen to someone talk with authority? It’s so cool to hear or see someone who owns their position in life. It’s like they are on a mission to accomplish something.

Most of my life is lived this way if I’m being honest. I generally walk and talk with conviction. I move a little faster than most, and I talk a little louder than many. Even if I’m unsure of something, I find it’s much better to boldly stand for what you’re doing than be all apologetic before you even speak. Then if I say or do something that’s not right, I’ll apologize but I’d much rather do that after I mess up than before I even have a chance to screw things up.

There’s a saying I grew up hearing that said if you’re going to sin, sin boldly. Now this statement in and of itself isn’t really all that helpful because it kind of sounds like we’re advocating doing the wrong things. The point isn’t to go out and do as much illegal activity as possible. It’s not even assuming that since you’re not perfect and going to mess up sooner or later that you may as well just excuse your bad behavior today. The saying is actually about confidence and conviction.

If you’re going to do something boldly it means you’re not going to just tip toe into it. It’s like the child at the swimming pool. Just jump in! I admire that about children actually. I love how they just jump in the pool. They don’t dangle their feet over the edge to get acclimated to the temperature of the water. No they jump in. Generally in a big splashy kind of way. Cannon balls. Bell flops. Just big old splash inducing jumps into the water.

But as we get older, we lose the courage to do this. We lose the adventure and wonder of jumping into the pool. But not just with jumping in the pool. We lose the courage in a lot of areas. We become toe dippers instead of belly floppers.

Sure there’s a time and a place for calculated risks and knowing your limits and all that. I totally understand being situationally cautious. But no every situation has to be fully mapped out before we begin to move. Not every situation needs a known ending before we take the first step.

I’d like to encourage you to take a step. Just one forward moving step. It might feel like you’re jumping into the deep end of the pool, but it’s one step. Move forward one little step and throw a little caution to the wind. Be confident in who you are and what you’re called to do. It’s not about being reckless. It’s about being confident and courageous and living like someone on a mission.

Grief Sucks

March 22, 2022 / / 0 Comments

We’ve all experienced it. We’ve all seen it. Felt it. Went through it. We’ve all had the taste of loss put in our mouths. Maybe the loss of a loved one to cancer. Maybe it was the loss of a job. Maybe we didn’t get the promotion and feel as if we lost out on something big. Maybe it’s the feeling of loss we have when a child moves out of the house. Maybe it’s the loss of a friend or even a spouse. All of these losses cause us to go through a time of grief. And to put it mildly, grief sucks.

Grief sucks because it’s hard. Grief is hard because there’s no clear cut path to make our way through it. And when we’re in an uncomfortable place, our number one priority is to get through it. We don’t want to be in a challenging situation any longer than is absolutely necessary. Grief is no different.

Everything around us tells us that we need to get over our grief. Sure people don’t say that but when you listen to their words, it’s pretty evident. We don’t like being around crying people because we don’t know what to say or do. So we try to give some feel good platitude that makes us feel like we’re doing something, but it really isn’t helpful in the least to the person grieving.

Grief is hard because it’s like quicksand. When we fall into grief, the more we resist it the more it sucks us right into its awful grasp. We become so tunnel visioned on the loss and the pain associated with it, that we can’t see anything positive around us at all.

Grief is suffered in moments, but is meant to be lived out in stories.

Think about it for a minute. The last time you were in a place of grief, what was your focus? It was the loss and only the loss. We become so tunnel visioned that we can’t see beyond the loss and the feelings of pain and abandonment associated with grief. It’s as if grief is all that’s left in life. But grief isn’t the end of the story, at least it doesn’t have to be.

When we realize that grief is acceptable and that there are stages of grief that allow us to move through it and not get trapped in the middle of it, we can soon see the power of baby steps. First of all, don’t hear what I’m not saying here. Grief is not something you need to get over. But you do need to move through. We all need to make progress walking through the darkness and loneliness of grief but we don’t do it alone.

As a pastor, I look at life a little different than some. I believe that grief has a very important purpose in our lives. Grief is a way to check ourselves on what’s important. Grief helps us see who and what is around us to walk with us through challenge. Grief, although awful, doesn’t get the final word.

I’ve suffered some pretty significant losses in life. From losing two grandparents in less than a year, to losing close friends, having to close a church and leave the people behind that I loved dearly. Loss is hard. It sucks to be honest. But grief is part of a story that is being written, but it doesn’t have to be the final chapter.

Another way to look at grief is to not let it have the final word. When we keep staring our loss in the face, day in and day out, we’re letting the pain and loss and grief consume us. The moment is becoming the story. It’s as if grief is getting to put a period, hard stop at the end of our joy. But that’s not healthy and it’s not even true!

Grief isn’t a period. It’s a comma. The purpose of a period is to show an ending. The purpose of a comma is to help you pivot to a new line of thought taking into account what just happened. This means that the loss you are experiencing right now can lead you to something next that could only be experienced with the taste of grief in your mouth. I know that’s hard to swallow because we just want it to end, but that’s not how grief works.

Grief has to run its course. For some it’s days. For others it takes months or even years. You’ll never get over the loss. But you’ll grow through the grief. The point is simple. Don’t let grief have the final say. Don’t let grief be a period where God intends a comma. Don’t let the moments of grief prevent you from experiencing the fullness of the story of your life. Grief sucks, but it’s not the end of your story.

Please note: if you are suffering from a loss and feel massive burdens of anxiety and depression, I would encourage you to find a professional to help you. There is absolutely nothing wrong with talking to someone who can help you process the grief and find healthy tools to aide in coping with the weight of grief. You’re not in this alone.

But Didn’t Jesus Say?

March 15, 2022 / / 0 Comments

Ok so since my last post I’ve received a couple of comments (two of them) from a couple of people (again 2 of them) who may not have found my words all that acceptable. And that’s totally cool. I absolutely love having what a friend of mine calls robust dialogue around issues upon which we disagree. Well the point of contention with the post about my job not being to feed you was with a reference to something Jesus actually said.

In an effort to get inside my head and heart a little and see why I wrote what I wrote and what the perceived in-congruencies are of this Bible verse and my previous post, I decided to dig into what Jesus told Peter and what I intended by my comments. Here you go…

In John 21, Jesus cooks a hearty breakfast of grilled fish over a charcoal fire and recommissions Peter into the work he was originally called to do. Way back at the beginning of His public ministry, Jesus calls disciples to come and follow me. Then he says, I will make you fishers of men. Somewhere along the line, Peter and his compadres took the command to follow me less seriously and thought Jesus should follow them. Peter went so far as to even deny Jesus around a charcoal fire while Jesus was on trial getting ready to be crucified.

Fast forward now to chapter 21. We are now on the shore with Jesus and Peter. And there’s a charcoal fire. In my mind this is really an important detail that we tend to gloss over. The fact that it’s called a charcoal fire and not a bonfire or wood fire or any other kind of fire to me seems significant. Why? You ask. Well there is only one other time in John’s gospel where a charcoal fire is mentioned, and yep you guessed it. The time Peter denied Jesus it was beside a charcoal fire.

Now to understand why this is so important you have to go back to the time you were beside a charcoal fire, or even a fire in your fire pit for that matter. If you’re a campfire lover then you undoubtedly know the smell of the smoke in your clothing and on your skin. This is an unmistakeable smell. Not to mention the sounds of the crackling and warmth it provides.

Imagine for a minute you’re Peter, and you walk up to this fire. You smell the charcoal and feel the warmth and hear the sounds of the fire crackling on the shore. Where does your mind go? I would guess this is why the text describes this as a charcoal fire, because John wants us to go there too! Right back to the last charcoal fire. Peter would have remembered denying Jesus. He would have likely thought that some sort of scolding was coming. But what did he get instead?

Hey Peter do you love me? Then why don’t you feed my sheep please.

What! Jesus didn’t scold Peter, but instead consecrated him for continued ministry and mission work. So that’s the first part of this passage that really sets the stage. Second is a hidden little gem in the Greek language about the use of two different words for love which we won’t have space for here. Then Jesus tells Peter to feed my sheep and tend my lambs. So the question that was raised by two people about my former post was essentially if Jesus told Peter to feed my sheep, why are you saying you’re not going to feed the sheep entrusted to you?

Great question! But it’s kind of a wrong question. Now don’t get your undies in a bunch here. I don’t mean that to come across all sassy. It’s jus…if you really think about this for a hot second. Jesus told Peter to feed my sheep. Peter knew how sheep were fed. Do you? Do you know how a first century Jewish shepherd would feed the sheep? They would pasture them. They wouldn’t chew the food for them or bottle feed them. Ok. Sure for a time, like when they were young or if there were problems a shepherd could give a given sheep a little more attention and care, but that wouldn’t last forever. The shepherd was charged with making sure the pasture was green with enough good grass for the sheep to graze. Not to spoon-feed the sheep.

Now take that same imagery of feed my sheep by letting them graze a pre-selected pasture and bring it into the church today. If we’re going to apply the command of Jesus to feed my sheep to our modern context, then we sure as the dickens better apply it’s original intent and context as well. If, as a pastor, my job is to feed the sheep as Peter was commanded to do using the imagery of a first century Jewish shepherd, then I am commanded to lead the people to the pasture and ensure the pasture is tended properly. Hence I’m not going to feed you, but I am going to take you to the food and lay the food before you.

So I’m still not going to feed you. I still don’t think it’s the job of a pastor, DCE, church body or anyone to go on feeding the people, like literally feeding them. But am I regularly going to lay the feast of God’s word in front of the people God entrusts to me? Abso-stinking-lutely! (Technical term for you betcha!) Am I going to make sure the Word of God is rightly taught so that all can have access to the truth of God’s unchanging word? You better believe it! Am I going to lay before the brothers and sisters the true Body and Blood of Jesus as a foretaste of a much greater meal to come in heaven? You can take that one to the bank!

But I’m not going to let you as a called disciple of Jesus sit around and wait for me, or anyone for that matter, to feed you. I don’t want anyone to make you think that pastors have some magical access or backstage pass to some truth you don’t have access to! I’m not going to pick up the spoon and feed you. I’m not going to chew the food for you. I’m going to show you, train you, equip you to use the gift of God in His Word so that you can be fed even when you’re not with a pastor.

So there you have it. Jesus did command Peter to feed the sheep. And I’ll do that the very way Peter would have fed the first century church and the way Jesus even fed the disciples. But I’m not going to chew the food up and spit it into your mouth. Come join me and let’s graze on the truths of God’s word together and see what amazing things He is doing all around us!

I’m Not Going To Feed You

March 11, 2022 / / 1 Comment

I remember when my kids were little. They were the cutest things. I would do anything for them. As a matter of fact, there is pretty much nothing I wouldn’t do for them still to this day. I remember when they were small I would feed them and clothe them and yes, even change their diapers. But there came a time when all of that had to stop. I had to stop feeding them, stop clothing them and changing them. If not what would they be like today?!

feeding

Now I’m going to get a little graphic with you for just a second in an effort to drive home a simple point. Imagine a young mother who is caring for her newborn child. She discretely goes to a quiet place to be able to breast feed her child. Nothing wrong with this right? You’re probably even wondering where’s the graphic part. But imagine that same young mother now about 30 years older. Imagine that once newborn now in his 30s walking up to his mother in her mid 50s saying he’s hungry. Imagine that same mother, now a little less shy, pulling up her shirt and letting her now 30 year old son breast feed. It’s just not right is it!?

I think pretty much everyone would find that a tad odd at minimum but somewhat offensive and even gross. Ok so put that image aside but not too far, because that’s exactly how we treat our lives as Christians. We come to church and expect the leaders, pastors, and called workers to essentially lift their shirts so they can be fed. I’m sorry but that ain’t how this is going down friends! I’m not in the feeding business. Not my job. Not my calling.

What I believe our calling as pastors and church workers and leaders in the church truly is, is to teach people how to feed themselves. Paul says in 1 Corinthians 3 that when it was right he gave those new to the faith pure spiritual milk. That’s what happens when we first come to know of Jesus. We don’t know how to pick up a fork or knife or even a spoon. So we’re fed the simple things. We glean off the top, the simple to digest parts of the message, just like being fed milk as a newborn.

But in time we can’t go through life that way anymore. In time we have to learn to pick up our utensils. We first learn how to use our spoons. Then we are entrusted with the fork and finally the knife is handed over to our use. As followers of Jesus, we need to learn when it’s time to grab our spoons and start digging into the details a little more. Then we learn the way to use our fork and knife.

If you’ve been in church for any length of time, you should know by now how to grab a spoon and stop simply drinking the easy stuff. Go a little deeper. Dig into that stew of God’s word. It’s still easy to digest. Somethings may surprise us but you can do it. I can’t feed you what you need. I can show you how to eat. Teach you how to use your utensils. Even set the table for you. But I won’t be feeding you.

Throughout the season of Lent, we are taking time to learn how to use our utensils and read the menu. We’re essentially learning what spoon feels like in our hand and how to properly hold the knife and fork without hurting ourselves or anyone else. Our goal is that you stop expecting us to feed you and that you soon learn how to eat on your own.

Now lest you think once you learn how to eat for yourself you have no need of us anymore, the point of learning to eat on your own is so that one day you can teach your own children. And that’s no different in the life of the church. We are raised up in a proper understanding of the gospel. We are given the tools of bible study and prayer and fasting and baptism and witnessing so that we can tell someone else. So we can show someone else how to use those same gifts that have allowed us to eat of the good, healthy, meaty spiritual foods on our own.

So in case I haven’t been clear, I am not going to feed you. And all of you jokers who are planning on coming to worship on Sunday asking for food, just don’t! 😉 It’s time to pick up your fork and learn to eat. Then it’s time to take what you’ve learned about how to eat, and use that knowledge to teach someone else. I’m not going to feed you. As a mature Christian it’s your job to learn how to eat. I’ll give you the tools, but I am not in the feeding business.

Are You A Ship In Harbor?

February 11, 2022 / / 0 Comments

I was reading an article recently and there was a quote from John Shedd that really stood out to me. The quote stood out because I think in life we can all relate in some way or another to doing exactly what this quote says. The quote said A ship in harbor is safe but that’s not why ships are built.

Some times in life we find the comforts of the harbor to be so compelling that we just don’t want to leave. I mean think about it. While in the harbor there is a whole crew right there at our disposal to tend to our needs. The deck can be washed with ease. The crew remains well rested. Little wear and tear occurs to the ship. It’s actually a very safe place. Rarely will the ship sink while in harbor. Passengers don’t get seasick while the ship remains anchored at the shore. But is that why a ship exists?

The short answer is a resounding no. We all know that a ship wasn’t designed to stay in the harbor. Your goods would never get delivered if the ship never left port. Your cruise would be pretty boring if you never left the harbor. New lands would have never been discovered if the ship would have remained safely anchored on shore.

I think in life, many people tend to gravitate to the places where there is little chance of being tossed and tormented by the raging seas. We all know that life is rough and in certain seasons life is more challenging than others! But staying in the harbor all the time robs the ship of the chance to see uncharted waters and experience unknown new lands.

As a pastor, this is one of the things I see so often that it scares me. As I talk to pastors and leaders of churches, I’m seeing an increasingly growing number of churches that are like ships anchored in harbor. We’re living a life we were never made to live. We’re safe. We’re protected. But there is a world of open sea out there that we were meant to navigate that remains uncharted.

I’m reminded of something Jesus said in Luke 19. I came to seek and save the lost. When a ship remains safely in the harbor, we certainly are not doing much seeking. We like to seek those who’ve already found us. And I hate to break it to you friends but that’s not seeking! That’s being found. The old build it and they will come business just isn’t effective. It’s not what the church was created to look like! The church was created to be a ship in the open waters. At one point Jesus even told his disciples to push out into deeper water. That means away from the shore and out of the harbor. When we remain in the harbor we find only a set grouping of people. Only those people who are living in close proximity to the harbor. But not everyone lives in the harbor. Jesus knew that. And if we’re being honest, we know it too!

A ship will never experience the purpose for which it was created if it remains anchored in the harbor. We’ll never know the feeling of the rising swells of water. We’ll never feel the ocean breezes on our face. The church was established to sail the open seas. Look at the design of some of the oldest churches out there. From an aerial view many of these churches even look like boats. Jesus told us to let down our nets and he would make us fishers of men. All of the imagery in the Bible is about the church, when it functions properly, being a boat in open waters.

Take a moment and honestly look at your situation. If you’re stuck in the harbor, then find someone to help you see life from a different perspective. Find someone who can help you get out of the harbor and into the exciting waters of life that are right in front of you.

5 Natural Trends We Need To Navigate

February 10, 2022 / / 0 Comments

Life has a way of acting kind of like the ocean. Some times the tide is high and crashing in while other times the tide is so far out we can easily manage life on the shore without even getting wet. And honestly like the tides there are some predictable patterns or trends we can see coming before they actually come crashing into the shore. But unlike the patterns of high and low tides, the patterns of life can be shortened or lengthened by how we react and prepare.

There are several things about life that we all know. Life can be a struggle. It can be fun. It can feel like things are spiraling out of control. We can feel like we’re in our sweetspot when things are going well. It can be monotonous and drone on and on. And things can start to crash all in seemingly a very small span of time. So what do we do? How do we manage all this change and shifting of tides in life?

There are two basic operating principles we need to take to heart before we can navigate these trends. The first thing we need to do is acknowledge that these shifts are coming sooner or later. We can’t stop all of the change from happening around us, no matter how hard we try. The second is that we all start in a point of struggle. It’s pretty much that simple. Everything from birth to starting a business to planting a new church to starting a new job, it all starts from a point of struggle. The rest of the trends or stages will flow out of that original struggle. It’s how we react to the struggle that determines how long we’re in struggle mode.

Party Time!

Generally speaking, when we navigate out of our time of struggle, we’ll settle into a new routine and we’ll see some pretty good things happen fairly quickly. In an organization of just about any kind, this is when pretty fast growth happens. People are happy and things are generally fun in this stage.

Think of a child in the younger years when they really don’t have a much of a care in the world. Life is pretty easy for them. We feed them. Clean up after them. Rock them. They just eat, sleep and make messes that they don’t have to do anything about! It’s like party time all the time.

Storm Season

When we progress through our season of parties and fun and all the excitement of the new beginnings, we undoubtedly will have to learn to navigate through a season of storms and devastation. This season of life unfortunately doesn’t happen just once. It’s repeated off and on. This season comes when the honeymoon phase of a new thing has ended. We settle into our routines. We start to question those around us and sometimes it causes us to question ourselves. The storms can be awful. And for many of us, we quit in the middle of one of these storms, but it doesn’t have to be that way.

This phase is like those teenage years when we argue with our parents incessantly. Our parents are morons. We are awkward. Our friends are butts. Our siblings are annoying. Life is just terrible, at least in our minds anyway.

The Groove

After the season of storm we will hit the pinnacle season of life where things just seem to go well. It’s like we settle into the groove and life goes unexpectedly well. This is the phase of life that everyone wants to be in but rarely do we stay here for long periods of time. We all too often don’t recognize this phase for what it is, so we fall backward into the stormy season or slide forward into the monotonous moments to come.

This is that season of life that typically brings us through graduation and into our first job. We’re making real money and enjoying the challenges and opportunities that life provides. This season can last for a long time if it’s nurtured properly, but most of the time we overlook the blessings that this season brings.

Monotonous Moments

If we don’t challenge the status quo while in the groove, we will easily and quite quickly slip forward into a season of monotony and boredom. It’s like driving through the plains states when you’re tired. Everything looks the same and you quickly fail to see the beauty of the moments around you. The time of monotony happens when the routine becomes the rule and there’s nothing exciting in front of us.

This phase of life is kind of like what happens when we realize the dream job we fell into after graduation doesn’t have all we thought it did. It’s what happens when fail to challenge ourselves or the systems around us. Life gets boring. We fall asleep at the wheel of life. And quitting is becoming more and more appealing.

The Crash

Unfortunately, if we don’t address the challenges of monotony we’ll end up in a head on collision with this final season. It’s when we crash and burn. We can’t see any light around us. We can’t see a way out. We isolate ourselves from those who care for us. We quit the thing with which we’ve grown bored. Instead of constantly looking for new opportunities, we look for a clear and easy way out. We give up on progress, happiness and success. We simply throw in the towel. Left unchecked this season can lead to some very serious personal issues with depression.

There are probably more seasons of life than just these few but in my experience these are some key markers to look out for in life. The point in sharing this is to make us aware of what’s going on. I find that when I know what to look out for I’m less likely to fall into it. Like a pothole on the road that I will swirve to miss, these seasons are some that I can be better prepared to maneuver through and around.

Are You Beating Yourself?

February 4, 2022 / / 0 Comments

I think there are times in life when we actually do ourselves more harm than good. I mean we have great intentions but when we really look at it we haven’t done much good at all. As a matter of fact, the good we thought we were doing was actually undone by the negative things caused by our actions. Ok that’s ambiguous so let’s dive in a little more.

The thoughts that follow are my observations from my own life and ministry. These are my failures. They are things I’ve had to work through on a variety of levels. And they are things that I still monitor closely to make sure I don’t fall back into some of these same bad habits and destructive ideas again.

You are not God.

Now that goes without saying but the issue is that we don’t live like this. Ok so admittedly we don’t necessarily go through life thinking we’re God, but we often make decisions and plans acting as if we are the most important person in the world. We pursue things that are all about personal happiness and individual success. We seek attention and put ourselves on a pedestal as if we’re the most important person in the room or universe. Believe me, I know a few of those too.

Friend it’s not about you. If you’re a leader of a team, parent, spouse or even friend to someone – you are not the point. A good friend, teammate, employer, parent or spouse will make decisions and go in directions that put the other person first. If we want to set ourselves and those around us up for the greatest success, start putting their needs before your own and watch how not only do their needs get met but yours will also!

The more you work, the less you get done.

This one sounds a bit like an oxymoron but it’s also very true. It’s kind of like that line they say on airplanes about the oxygen masks. If you’re traveling with small children, please secure the oxygen mask to yourself before placing it on your child. For the longest time I found this to be wildly insensitive and a horribly wrong practice! I mean who in the world is going to watch their child suffocate while they get the good air?! So I asked one of those friendly Southwest flight attendants why in the world this was the rule. They were patient with my stupidity and didn’t make me feel like too much of an idiot in their answer. She simply told me that if I couldn’t breathe, how could I make sure my child was breathing? Wow. Then it all started to click. Side note: I wasn’t even traveling with children which made my question that much more strange.

Back to over working. So the whole put the mask on the child thing is like taking a needed rest in order to be more productive. It doesn’t make sense until you ask a few questions. Then step back and realize that like a parent with no oxygen can’t help their child, so also a person who’s overworked and exhausted can’t focus on the job at hand and will likely not be productive nor effective. Getting the rest you need and stepping away from the task at hand for a minute is often the most powerful way to get more done.

Give yourself traveling time.

I have a tendency to stack appointments in my calendar pretty tight. I know how long it takes me to get from one place to another under normal conditions. And when I have to be somewhere I generally like to arrive on time, which for me is about 5-7 minutes early. But there are those times when we stack so many things so tightly in our calendar that we just can’t get it all done. We have no time to get from point A to point B.

This is also true with general calendaring without travel. The premise is that we tend to stack our appointments or tasks so tightly that there’s no breathing room at all. We move from task to task without giving our brains a chance to change gears. We run from one project to a totally unrelated project and wonder why our mind feels like mush at the end of the day.

There’s nothing wrong with stepping away for even as little as 3 minutes to use the bathroom, walk down the hallway, listen to music, close your eyes or just stare off into space. These are simple techniques that can clear your mind and let your brain get the space it needs to restart in a different gear.


Diversify your diet.

Now this one might be a tad misleading, so let me explain. I am not talking about your food diet, although that’s very important as well. I’m referring to the diet of information that you feed yourself. If you continually feed your brain with the same content over and over without any variation, you’re going to be mentally malnourished to say the least. It’s like eating crackers all the time with no protein or vegetables. You just won’t perform at your peak.

The same is true for what we put into our minds. I tend to read or listen to a variety of books. Some of these are books related to my field as a pastor. Others are leadership books. Others are on finance or parenting or how to understand what’s going on in my preteen daughter’s mind (ok so there’s really nothing that will help with that one but it’s worth a shot). The point is to try to look at the world around you through the many lenses at your disposal. Consuming content from a variety of sources helps you see not only your thought process more clearly, but also helps you appreciate where others are coming from and have more intelligent conversations about topics on which you disagree.

These are just a few of the many things I’ve had to learn the hard way in life. I hope they are somewhat helpful to you and provide you with a shortcut of sorts to not stay stagnant.

Grace Upon Grace

February 1, 2022 / / 0 Comments
Bear One Another's Burdens - Verse Meaning Explained

I get to see all sorts of things in my line of work. Many people joke around about me only working an hour on a Sunday and the rest of the week goof off with video games or who knows what. To be totally honest, there are things that come across my desk as a pastor that I really wish I didn’t have to manage. But there are other parts of my day that make me just pause and realize how amazing some of the people who surround me truly are.

The situations that blindside us and pretty much throw us into a tailspin are the things no one wants to deal with. We run from them. We fight to get out of them. We try to make our way through them. But really we just want these unknown and unsolicited crappy days to just go away. Whether they are relationship meltdowns, financial crises, disturbing health news or family drama, we will have to come to grips with some level of all of these things throughout our lives. How we make it through some of these truly life changing moments often is determined by who we let into our circle.

One of the most blessed parts of my job is to be someone who is trusted to be part of someone’s circle. I get the honor of being the person who’s there when good times happen. I get to hear the good news of a baby born or a guy “popping the question.” I get to see the smiles and endless grins on the faces of those who are filled with the joy of living.

But I’m also honored to be invited into some of the darkest and scariest moments of people’s lives. I am called on when a loved one is ill, hospitalized or tragically dies. I’m there when a child needs medical attention. I’m invited into the circle when families are in turmoil and trust within friendships becomes broken. I get to be present when tears flow and hearts are broken and fear overwhelms.

I write these things not to pat myself on the back but to remind you that you are vastly important to me. No matter what level of connection I’ve had in your life, believe me when I say that walking with you through good or bad times is an absolute honor. It’s something I do not take lightly.

As I write this some of you are filled with joy while others are barely able to breathe under the pressures of life. No matter which end of that spectrum you may be on, know that I or someone like me is just a call away. We do have limitations and boundaries but in general we are here.

It is in these moments, entering someone’s story especially a story of crisis that I witness some of the most amazing displays of grace that one could ever imagine. It is in the moments when life is unraveling at a pace that is dizzying, that we get to witness someone’s true character. It’s not when life is easy that the real person shines forward. It’s when they are stressed beyond belief, broken seemingly beyond repair, weak beyond imagination that someone reveals who they truly are at their core.

I have recently come to realize that the strongest people in the world are not necessarily in a uniform, at the gym or wearing a cape. They are simple, ordinary people who put their feet on the floor in the morning when they’d rather stay in bed. They move forward when it would be way easier to fall backward. They stand when the world says to sit down. They remain silent when every ounce of their anger says to speak. They’re the people who demonstrate grace in ways that I didn’t know were humanly possible.

To the many people who’ve been a part of why circle and invited me to be a part of your story over the past several decades, thank you for showing me what grace looks like in so many ways. Thank you for being the evidence of grace upon grace in even the least graceful of circumstances. Thank you for the trust you’ve shown. Thank you for showing me what the love of Jesus looks like today.

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