living for eternity today

Tag: Jesus (Page 1 of 60)

The Weight of the Towel: When Serving Hurts

Part 3 of the “Towel-Bearers: Redefining Leadership” Series


You said yes to serve.
You said yes to love.
You said yes to Jesus – (after he said yes to you).

But somewhere along the way, that towel you picked up started to feel like a weight chained to your soul.

You’re tired. Not just in your body—but in your spirit.
You still show up. Still pour out. Still smile when you’re asked, “How’s ministry going?” But underneath it all, you’re running on fumes.

Welcome to the weight of the towel.


Serving Hurts Sometimes. And That’s Not a Sign You’re Doing It Wrong.

Myth: “If I were really called to this, it wouldn’t feel this hard.”

Jesus was called. Perfectly. And still—He sweat blood in the garden.

He served, knowing the cross was waiting. He washed Judas’ feet, knowing the betrayal was coming.
He kept showing up—not because it didn’t hurt—but because love is stronger than pain.

So yeah, it’s going to hurt sometimes.
Not because you’re broken.
But because you’re becoming like Jesus.


3 Realities of Leading With a Tired Soul

1. You Will Run Out—That’s Why You Need to Be Filled

You’re not the source. Never were. You were never meant to carry the weight of every need, every crisis, every expectation.

Even Jesus withdrew to lonely places to pray (Luke 5:16).
If the Son of God had to unplug to be filled—what makes you think you can run without stopping?

This is your reminder: Rest is not weakness. It’s worship.
You’re not abandoning the mission when you sabbath—you’re sustaining it.


2. Just Because It Hurts Doesn’t Mean It’s Not Holy

Pain doesn’t always mean you’re out of place. Sometimes, it’s proof you’re walking the right path.

Paul didn’t plant churches from a place of comfort—he planted them with scars.
Real servant leaders don’t avoid pain—they endure it for the sake of others.

But here’s the catch: Suffering in silence isn’t sainthood—it’s pride. Don’t wear burnout like a badge. Talk to someone. Let people in. You’re not less spiritual for needing help—you’re more human.


3. You’re Not Saving Anyone—Jesus Is

You’re not the Messiah. You’re not the answer. You’re a messenger.

When the weight gets too heavy, remember: you were never meant to carry the cross. You’re just called to carry the towel.

Let Jesus carry you.


To the Worn-Out Leader…

You don’t have to be strong every day.
You don’t have to fix everything.
You don’t have to carry this alone.

God sees you.
Not the polished version. Not the public one. The real you.

He sees the tears you’ve cried in your car.
The text messages you never got a response to.
The late nights. The misunderstood moments. The quiet serving no one ever applauded.

And He says, “Well done.”


Want more?
Stay with us for Part 4 of Towel-Bearers: Redefining Leadership:
“Not Your Platform: The Kingdom Isn’t About You” — a gut-check on ego, branding, and who the spotlight really belongs to.

How to Spot a Counterfeit Leader (And Why It Matters More Than You Think)

Part 2 of the “Towel-Bearers: Redefining Leadership” Series


Not everyone with a Bible and a microphone should be leading people.
Yeah, there are counterfeit leaders in the Church. And they’re not always easy to spot. They sound holy. They know the lingo. They wear the “right” clothes. They inspire crowds, cast vision, and quote Scripture on demand. But behind the scenes, it’s not about Jesus—it’s about their own control, ego, and power.

Jesus warned us: “Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing but inwardly are ravenous wolves.”(Matthew 7:15, ESV)

We should’ve been listening.


4 Signs of a Counterfeit Leader

1. People Are Used, Not Shepherded

Counterfeit leaders don’t build people up—they use them to build their platform. If you’re only celebrated when you’re useful, and ghosted when you’re not, you’re not being pastored. You’re being leveraged.

Servant-hearted leaders walk with you—especially when you can’t offer anything in return.


2. Disagreement Is Punished, Not Processed

Try questioning their decision. Watch what happens.

If the response is silence, guilt-tripping, or spiritual intimidation (“Touch not the Lord’s anointed!”), that’s not leadership. That’s dictatorship in a title or position.

Jesus welcomed correction, modeled vulnerability, and still stooped to wash His disciples’ feet.


3. Fear Replaces Freedom

If you constantly feel anxious around your leader—like any wrong move will cost you your place—you’re not under godly authority. You’re under human control.

Jesus sets people free. Leadership that leads with fear doesn’t come from Him.


4. Their Private Life Doesn’t Match Their Platform

This is the hardest one. You don’t always see it right away. But true leadership shows up in the home, in the staff culture, in the way they treat the least powerful around them.

If their public presence is polished but the people closest to them are walking on eggshells—pay attention.


There’s Grace for This

Maybe this stings because you’ve followed a counterfeit leader.
Maybe it stings more because you’ve been (or are) one.

There’s grace. There’s always grace. But grace doesn’t mean silence. And it doesn’t mean ignoring the pain of those who’ve been hurt in the name of “leadership.”

You’re not crazy. You’re not bitter. You’re just waking up.


The Call: Watch for Fruit, Not Flash

We need leaders who bleed love, not demand loyalty.
Who show up in silence, not just in the spotlight.
Who carry towels, not just sit on their personal thrones.

Don’t settle for stage lights. Look for the ones who stay when the lights go out.


Want more?
Stay tuned for Part 3 of our Towel-Bearers series:
“The Weight of the Towel: When Serving Hurts” — how to lead with a servant’s heart when your soul is tired.

Real Leaders Bleed for Their People: Not Themselves

Let’s stop pretending. Not all leaders are actually leading. Some are just collecting titles, hoarding influence, and stepping on people to build their brand.

That’s not leadership. That’s ego dressed in a suit and given a fancy title.

True leadership is bleeding for people, not basking in applause. It’s wiping the tears of the hurting, not curating a platform for personal glory. It’s making late-night phone calls, sitting in hospital rooms, helping someone move, delivering meals in silence, showing up again when nobody else does. Leaders aren’t called to be adored—they’re called to serve.

Let’s call it what it is: the world is packed with self-aggrandizing leaders. They love the microphone, the likes, the platform, the “vision casting,” and the endless meetings where they get to hear themselves talk. They talk at people, not with them. They think being “up front” is proof of anointing. They say phrases like, “If I don’t lead, who will?” as if God’s church would fall apart without them.

Newsflash friend: if your “leadership” ends when the camera turns off or the praise team stops playing your favorite walk-up song, you’re not leading—you’re performing.

The servant-hearted leader lives differently.

They lead from the back of the line, not the front of the stage. They’re not chasing attention—they’re chasing people who are slipping through the cracks. Their heart beats for the broken, the ignored, the exhausted. They don’t keep score. They don’t manipulate with spiritual language. They don’t delegate compassion. They do the work themselves.

When someone’s world falls apart, servant leaders are the ones who cancel their plans to be there. When someone’s marriage is struggling, they listen without judgment. When a church member can’t pay a bill, they quietly cover it without a word. No social media posts. No public applause. Just a heart that says, “I’m here because you matter.”

Jesus didn’t build a brand—He washed feet.

He didn’t hold strategy meetings to decide whether the disciples were “aligned with the mission statement.” He knelt on the floor, grabbed a towel, and scrubbed the dirt off their feet like a lowly house slave. And then He said, “I have given you an example, that you also should do just as I have done to you” (John 13:15, ESV).

He meant it. Leadership in the kingdom is not power—it’s posture. A towel, not a throne. A cross, not a crown.

So here’s the gut check: Are you the kind of leader who lays down your life—or just one who talks about sacrifice while protecting your own comfort? When your people are in need, are you reaching down, or are you too busy reaching for a microphone?

Servant-hearted leadership is not glamorous. It’s not always visible. But it’s real. It looks like someone who shows up with groceries when the fridge is empty. Someone who stays after the meeting to listen to the one who didn’t speak up. Someone who prays with others, not just over them.

It’s raw. It’s inconvenient. It’s beautiful.

We need more of it.

Let’s stop chasing titles and start chasing towels. Let’s be the leaders who go out of our way—who go the extra mile without anyone watching. Let’s bleed love. Let’s live low. Let’s lead like Jesus.

That’s the kind of leadership the church needs. It’s the kind of leader the world needs.

Rising From the Ashes

This Holy Week has most definitely been unlike any I’ve ever experienced.

As we approached the most sacred days of our faith—the suffering, death, and resurrection of Jesus—we were met with a trial of our own. A fire broke out in our church building. It was significant. Rooms we’ve prayed in, served in, and celebrated in were damaged. Walls were blackened. Equipment has been lost. We’re going to be a bit disjointed for a while.

But make no mistake: this fire will not have the final word.

Because we serve a God who specializes in resurrection.

The truth of Easter isn’t just a story we tell. It’s a power we live by. When Jesus stepped out of the grave, He proved that death doesn’t win. Despair doesn’t win. Devastation doesn’t win. The worst thing is never the last thing.

So yes, our building took a hit. But the church is not a building. The Church is a people. A people of resurrection. A people of hope. A people who believe in the God who makes beauty from ashes.

Isaiah 61:3 promises that God will give “a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.” That’s our prayer and our posture in this season. We are not alone. We are not defeated. We are not without purpose.

This Easter, as we remember the stone rolled away and the Savior risen, we’re clinging to that same truth for ourselves: we too will rise.

It may take time to rebuild. It may be messy. But grace is already showing up in big ways—from the firefighters who contained the flames quickly, to the neighbors and church family rallying in prayer and clean up efforts, to the Spirit of God reminding us: this is not the end of the story.

One thing we hold very dear is that we meet people in the messiness of life. Well, this community has turned the tables and met us right in our own messiness and we can’t thank you enough! Friends, we’re in this together and we’re so glad we have you walking with us!

Jesus rose from the grave.
We will rise from these ashes.

We are blessed, even in brokenness. And we’re moving forward together—renewed, refined, and ready for what God will do next.

He is risen.
And so shall we.

The Real “You Be You” Problem

“You do you.”
“Live your truth.”
“Follow your heart.”

These all sound empowering, right?
It’s the self-esteem gospel of our generation.
The problem? It’s killing us.

Let’s call it what it is:
A beautiful-sounding lie.

And it’s everywhere. We see it in Disney movies, Instagram captions, graduation speeches, and TikTok reels. The message is always the same: The path to peace is found by looking inward.

But here’s the harsh reality is: Your heart is not a compass—it’s a disaster.

“The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?”
— Jeremiah 17:9 (ESV)

That verse doesn’t make for a great Hallmark card. I know! But it does explain a lot.


The Myth of Self-Discovery

We’ve been told that the ultimate goal in life is to “discover who you are” and “authentically live that out.” Sounds noble. Except it doesn’t work. Why?

Because who we are without Jesus is broken. We’re born into sin, bent toward selfishness, prone to pride, and wired to seek validation from anywhere but God.

Hustle culture says, “Be your best self.”
Jesus says, “Die to yourself.” (Luke 9:23)

Influencers say, “Chase your dreams.”
Jesus says, “Follow me.” (Matthew 4:19)

Culture says, “You are enough.”
Jesus says, “I am enough.” (2 Corinthians 12:9)


When “You Be You” Goes Off the Rails

We’ve never had more self-expression and less identity. More personalization and less peace. More curated profiles and fewer real relationships.

You be you has morphed into a license for chaos. When “living my truth” overrides the truth, everything collapses.

Marriage gets redefined. Gender gets deconstructed. Truth gets relativized. And people get more confused, more anxious, and more spiritually lost than ever before.

And all the while, Jesus is still whispering the same thing He’s said for 2,000 years:

“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”
— Matthew 11:28 (ESV)


The Way Out

But there is good news. You weren’t created to “be you.” You were created to be His.

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.”
— 2 Corinthians 5:17 (ESV)

Jesus doesn’t want to upgrade the old you—He wants to transform you.

Not into a fake church version of yourself.
Not into a robotic rule-follower.
But into someone fully alive in grace, truth, freedom, and purpose.

You don’t have to invent your identity. You can receive it—from the One who made you.


So What Now?

If you’re tired of chasing your tail trying to “find yourself,” here are a few ways to get real:

1. Get Honest

Admit that “you be you” hasn’t delivered. The hustle for identity is exhausting. Name it. Own it. And bring it to Jesus.

2. Open the Word

God doesn’t leave your identity to guesswork. Start with Ephesians 1. See what God says is already true of you in Christ.

3. Join a Community That’s After Truth

Stop surrounding yourself with echo chambers and empty slogans. Find people who point you to Jesus, even when it’s uncomfortable. Find people who can speak hard truth into your life. You don’t have to like it but you absolutely need it.

4. Ask Better Questions

Instead of “Who am I?” ask, “Whose am I?” Instead of “What do I want to be?” ask, “Who is God calling me to become?”


Jesus didn’t come to help you “find yourself.” He came to help you lose your life—and find something better. Not fake. Not filtered. Not fragile.

Real identity. Real purpose. Real peace.

So let’s stop settling for slogans and start chasing truth.

If you’re ready to trade “you be you” for something deeper, come check out what God is doing around here. No filters. No pretending. Just real people becoming who Jesus made us to be.

A Search for Something Real

We are more connected than ever—and more anxious than ever.

Scroll. Compare. Numb. Repeat.
Welcome to the new normal. And it’s not working.

If you feel more distracted, more anxious, more unsure of who you are—you’re not alone. You’re living in the age of curated chaos. And it’s messing with our minds and our souls.

Psychologist and author Jonathan Haidt calls it out in his new book, The Anxious Generation. His research is clear: the rise of the smartphone and social media has triggered a mental health crisis—especially among teens.

Haidt writes,

“We have overprotected our children in the real world, while underprotecting them in the virtual world.”

Translation?
We pad our kids when they ride their bikes, but we’ve made the internet a playground with no guardrails. Yet we seem shocked when kids crash emotionally and relationally.


It’s Not Just a Teen Problem

Adults are drowning too.
Doomscrolling. Anxiety spirals. FOMO.
We live in a world that’s constantly broadcasting but rarely connecting.

We’re flooded with highlight reels, rage bait, and fake perfection—then wonder why we feel empty. TikTok doesn’t offer identity. Instagram can’t give peace. And followers don’t equal friends.

Jesus said it plain:

“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.”
— John 14:27 (ESV)

But we’ve traded real peace for digital noise.


The Lie of “Always On”

The Anxious Generation explains it well—when life becomes about 24/7 performance, your soul burns out.

There’s no off switch. No quiet. No rest.

We’re chasing likes, dodging judgment, and comparing every moment to someone else’s edited and filtered version of reality.

Haidt argues that the decline of in-person experiences—sports, youth groups, family dinners—has been replaced by infinite screen time. And it’s wrecking emotional health.

And here’s the hard truth:
We weren’t made for this.

We were made for presence.
For purpose.
For real connection.

“Be still, and know that I am God.”
— Psalm 46:10 (ESV)


What If There’s Another Way?

What if you stopped scrolling long enough to breathe?
What if you stopped comparing long enough to look around and notice—
You’re not alone.
You’re not broken.
And you don’t have to hustle for your worth.

Jesus didn’t come to build your brand. He came to restore your soul.

He didn’t die so you could look better in selfies. He died so you could live—fully, freely, fearlessly.

“I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.”
— John 10:10 (ESV)


So What Can We Do?

Here are some bold, practical steps for fighting back against the anxious spiral:

1. Reclaim Your Mornings

Before you reach for your phone, reach for the Word. Start with a Psalm. Give God your first scroll. Not a Jesus person? Focus on something other than what everyone else is doing. Deep breathing. Go for a walk. Sit in the quiet and meditate for a few minutes.

2. Digital Sabbath

Take one day a week to power down. No social. No emails. Just real life, real people, real moments. Sabbath is a biblical idea but it’s not just for Jesus’ followers. We were all designed to hit the pause button. So find some intentional time to pause and re-center.

3. In-Person Beats Online

Join a small group. Invite a friend to coffee. Get in a room where people know your name and your story. We’ve tried to make something highly relational into something purely digital but you just can’t do that. Relationships don’t form as fully when they’re fully digital.

4. Talk About It

Anxiety loses power when it’s spoken. Talk to someone. A pastor. A counselor. A friend. Don’t battle this alone. Anxiety and worry win when they are the only voices we hear. Talking through a challenge or struggle will lessen its intensity over you.

5. Follow Jesus, Not Just Influencers

He’s not trending—but He’s truth. He doesn’t offer filters—He offers freedom. Influencers come and go. You’re always trying to find the right person to imitate. But Jesus calls us to simply follow him. Like a little child walking behind their dad through thick snow stepping into every footprint of the father. Follow where Jesus leads and you won’t be led astray.


It’s Time to Get Real

Fake connection is killing us.
Let’s trade pixels for presence.
Let’s go after something deeper than the algorithm can offer.

If you’re tired of anxiety running your life, there’s hope. His name is Jesus. He’s not a trend—He’s the truth. And He’s still healing hearts.


You don’t have to fake it here.
You just have to show up.

Let’s find peace again. Together.


I’m Sick And Tired of Boring

Warning – unpopular topic: A lot of church is boring.

Not just “I didn’t like the music” boring.
Not just “the sermon went too long” boring.
I’m talking soul-numbing, mind-wandering, when-is-lunch boring.

And people—young and old—are done pretending otherwise.
But here’s the kicker: It’s not Jesus’ fault.

Jesus is anything but boring. I mean check this out.

He turned water into wine at a party (John 2:1–11).
He walked on water (Mark 6:48–50).
He told off the religious elite and made friends with the people they hated (Luke 7:34).
He rose from the dead (Matthew 28:6).
Jesus lived the most electric, revolutionary life in history.

So why does following Him sometimes feel like sitting through a committee meeting?

Here’s the truth most churches don’t want to admit: Church is boring when it stops looking like Jesus.


The Early Church Was Anything But Dull

Read the book of Acts. The early church wasn’t a weekly religious event—it was a movement. People sold their stuff to take care of each other. Healings broke out. Prison doors swung open. Thousands came to faith in a day. They gathered daily and couldn’t get enough.

“And they devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers… And awe came upon every soul.”
— Acts 2:42–43 (ESV)

Did you see that? It’s about Awe. Not apathy.

Something has gone terribly wrong.


So What’s Making Church Boring?

  • Predictable routines. Same songs. Same words or phrases sung ad nauseam Same format. Same surface-level sermons. We do the same thing the same way and often forget why we’re even doing it.
  • Performance over participation. People watch, but don’t engage. When you look at it honestly, worship is mostly people observing what one dude does from an elevated platform for about an hour. That’s a performance even if we call it Divine Service.
  • Safe topics. We avoid hard questions, real pain, and messy issues. So much of what is taught in churches today is vanilla at best. We tend to tow the party line or blend in with culture. That’s not the way of Jesus by the way.
  • Disconnected community. You can attend for months and never be known. When all we do is sit and watch then leave for lunch, we’ve missed the whole point of what God designed worship to look like.

And while churches argue about traditions, people are walking away—because they’re starving for something real. And they’re finding it anywhere but the church!


What Do We Do About It?

It’s time to be done playing church. We need to be the church. That means making some changes:

1. Authentic Worship

No more karaoke-style singing. We want worship that invites the heart, not just the voice. So let’s choose songs with depth, passion, and space for people to connect with God—not just perform for Him.

2. Sermons That Punch

If Jesus confronted culture, challenged religious systems, and offered hope to the hopeless, our preaching should too. We don’t preach to fill 25 minutes—we preach to spark life change.

“For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword…”
— Hebrews 4:12 (ESV)

3. Participation Over Performance

NO more spectators. We want soldiers. We’re building teams, creating space for stories, and asking people to serve, speak, and show up.

4. Messy Conversations

Life’s not clean, so church shouldn’t pretend to be. It’s ok to talk about addiction, anxiety, doubt, divorce, and purpose—because God meets us in the middle of our mess.

5. Relentless Mission

Church shouldn’t just be a holy huddle. It’s time to get out in the community serving, giving, inviting, and loving people toward Jesus.


Your Move

If church has bored you, I get it. But don’t give up on Jesus because His people got boring. Don’t settle for stale religion when there’s a wildfire kind of faith available.

Here’s what you can do:

  • Re-engage. Don’t just attend—join a team, ask questions, show up early, stay late. Try something we call worship + 2. In addition to sitting in worship, join 1 group that allows you to grow in your faith. Then jump onto 1 team to serve and live it out in real time.
  • Be honest. Talk to a leader or a pastor. Tell someone what’s missing for you. What about worship feels dull? Maybe there’s a way to meet that need. Maybe there’s a ministry that can be started to move the needle a little.
  • Pray dangerous prayers. Ask God to shake things up. He will. If your prayers are things you can make happen, then they’re not prayers! It’s vocalizing your wish list. Pray bold prayers. Experience bold moves of God.
  • Invite someone. It’s amazing how church changes when you’re on mission, not just maintenance mode. When you invite someone to join you, you take ownership not just of the church to which you belong but the faith you say you have.

Jesus didn’t die to make church safe.
He died to make people alive.

So let’s build churches that reflect Him—bold, real, powerful, alive.

We Don’t Need a Safe Jesus

Jesus isn’t safe.
And the longer we keep trying to make Him safe, the further we get from who He really is.

We’ve created a sanitized version of Jesus—a gentle motivational speaker who sprinkles feel-good wisdom into our week, stays politically neutral, avoids conflict, and mostly wants us to be nice people. That’s Tinker Bell. It’s NOT Jesus!

That Jesus doesn’t exist.
And frankly, if he did He’s not worth following.

The real Jesus flips tables (Matthew 21:12–13).
He calls religious leaders snakes and hypocrites (Matthew 23:33).
He casts demons into pigs (Mark 5:1–13).
He tells rich, successful people to give it all up (Mark 10:21).
He demands total allegiance—even over your own family (Luke 14:26).

The real Jesus is dangerous. Not because He harms, but because He disrupts. He shakes kingdoms, flips power structures, and demands your entire life. He doesn’t ask for your Sunday morning. He wants you.

“If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.”
— Luke 9:23 (ESV)

That’s not a self-help plan. That’s a call to die.
To your pride.
To your control.
To your idols.

The Jesus of Scripture walks into storms, not away from them.
He embraces outcasts, welcomes prostitutes, eats with corrupt tax collectors, and calls cowards to become courageous.

When people saw Him coming, they either ran toward Him or plotted to kill Him. No one stayed neutral. That’s how you know you’re meeting the real Jesus—not the sanitized one.


The Safe Jesus Keeps You Comfortable.

The Real Jesus Sets You Free.

The sanitized Jesus is a reflection of us. He never offends. Never challenges. Never transforms. He fits neatly into our political parties, lifestyle choices, and Instagram aesthetic.

But the real Jesus? He doesn’t fit anywhere but the throne.

He’s not your homeboy. He’s not your mascot. He’s not even the man upstairs.
He’s the King of Kings who walked out of a tomb and claimed authority over your story.

“All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me.”
— Matthew 28:18 (ESV)

We keep asking Jesus to bless our plans. He keeps asking us to drop everything and follow Him.


So What Do We Do With a Jesus Like This?

You’ve only got two options.

  1. Keep following the sanitized version.
    He’ll let you stay the same. He’ll even keep you safe for a while. But ultimately, he’ll fail you—because he’s just a mirror of your comfort zone.
  2. Or follow the real Jesus.
    He’ll stretch you. Challenge you. Lead you into places you never thought you’d go. But you’ll never be alone. And you’ll never be the same.

“I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.”
— John 10:10 (ESV)


Ready for the Bold Life?

If you’re tired of safe religion…
If you want more than churchy routines and feel-good platitudes…
If you’re ready to go all-in on the dangerous, beautiful, real Jesus—then now’s the time.

Here’s your move:
Get a Bible. Read the Gospels (I start with John—it’s fast and raw and shows exactly who Jesus is).
Ask Jesus, “What are you calling me to leave behind?”
Then leave it…right there…right then.

Don’t settle for a safe Jesus.
Follow the One who walks on water, calms storms, and calls dead men out of graves. That Jesus is worth everything.


Want more of this bold journey with Jesus? Shoot me a message or come visit us this Sunday. We don’t do sanitized religion—we follow a Savior who changes lives.

Let’s go.

Rediscovering the Church’s Mission

Time for some hard truth and real self assessment.  The Church has gotten comfortable. For too long, we’ve relied on cultural Christianity to do the heavy lifting for us. We built impressive buildings, filled pews with people who knew how to play the church game, and assumed that because our communities had churches on every corner, Jesus was winning the culture war.

But that era is gone. And maybe—even probably—that’s a good thing.

We live in a post-Christian world. Christianity no longer holds the cultural dominance it once did. People aren’t coming to church out of obligation or habit anymore. And let’s be real—many of them don’t see the Church as a beacon of hope but as an outdated institution, riddled with hypocrisy and filled with irrelevance.

So, what now? Do we keep tweaking our programs, hoping that if we make church just a little more attractive, people will magically show up? Do we throw in some coffee bars, trendier worship music, and another round of shallow small groups to keep people entertained? Or do we actually do what Jesus called us to do—make disciples?

Moving Beyond Consumer Christianity

For decades, churches have operated like spiritual vending machines: show up, get your inspirational message, grab a cup of coffee, and get on with your life. We’ve trained people to be religious consumers rather than transformed disciples of Jesus. And now, as culture shifts, those consumers are checking out.

But the mission of the Church was never about drawing crowds; it was about making disciples. It was about sending capacity not seating capacity. Discipleship isn’t about attracting people to a weekly service—it’s about equipping people to live out their faith in a world that no longer assumes Christianity as the default. That means:

  • Getting back to relational evangelism. Jesus didn’t build a marketing strategy—He built relationships. We can’t just preach at people; we have to walk with them. And “we” isn’t the pastors – it’s the men and women and children who make up the church.
  • Shifting from programs to presence. We don’t need more events; we need more people willing to invest in the messy, real lives of their neighbors. It’s not about calling people out of daily life but embedding ourselves into their everyday routines.
  • Making faith an all-week thing. Sunday morning Christianity is dead. The future Church will thrive when believers see themselves as missionaries in their workplaces, schools, and communities every single day. This is what we call the places where they live, work and play.

The Church as a Movement, Not an Institution

When Jesus launched His ministry, He didn’t build a brand. He didn’t craft a strategic plan. He invited people to follow Him, to surrender their lives, and to join a movement that would change the world. The early Church spread like wildfire not because they had great programming but because they had people on fire for Jesus. None of these things are wrong, but if they replace our fire for Christ, then they have to go.

Somewhere along the way, we traded that movement for maintenance. We became more obsessed with keeping people in the seats than sending them out into the world. But the post-Christian era is forcing us to reckon with a truth we should have never forgotten: the Church isn’t a building or a brand—it’s a people, empowered by the Holy Spirit, sent into the world to love, serve, and proclaim the Gospel.

The Future is Missional

The good news? Christianity thrives when it’s in the margins. Historically, the Church has always been at its strongest when it wasn’t the dominant power but the disruptive force of love, truth, and grace in a broken world.

So, let’s stop wringing our hands over declining attendance numbers. Let’s stop measuring success by how many people sit in our pews and start measuring it by how many people are sent into the world, living as bold witnesses for Jesus. Let’s be the kind of Church that doesn’t just ask, “How can we get people in the doors?” but instead asks, “How can we send them out as disciples?”

The world doesn’t need another comfortable, consumer-driven church. It needs a movement of Jesus-followers who refuse to settle, who live out radical love, and who bring the light of Christ into a dark world.

If you’re ready for this kind of life transformation, then welcome to the church. If you want soft, then maybe you should find a day spa.

The Church Has Become Too Soft

Somewhere along the way, the message of the Church has changed. Not the message of the gospel – the message of the church. The image the church portrays to her members and the community. At some point we exchanged the rugged faith of warriors, prophets, and apostles and it became something tame—soft, sentimental, and, frankly, uninspiring to many men. And the result? A mass exodus of men from leadership in the church.

Jesus Wasn’t a Nice Guy—He Was a King and a Warrior

In case you’re unaware, Jesus wasn’t some passive, mild-mannered guru preaching niceties. He was bold, confrontational, and fearless. He flipped tables (John 2:15, ESV). He rebuked hypocrites with fire in His words (Matthew 23:33, ESV). He faced torture and even death without flinching (Luke 22:42, ESV). The biblical picture of Jesus is of a leader who called men to die to themselves and take up their cross (Luke 9:23, ESV)—not to sit quietly and be passive.

Yet, in many churches today, the message has been neutered. Sermons focus on being “safe,” “kind,” and “inclusive,” while avoiding the reality of spiritual warfare, sacrifice, and the fight for holiness. Church has become more about feelings than faithfulness, about comfort rather than conviction. Men, wired for challenge and purpose, are checking out.

The Church Has Softened the Call to Masculine Leadership

The Bible is unapologetic in calling men to lead. Not to dominate, but to lead with courage, strength, and responsibility. “Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong” (1 Corinthians 16:13, ESV). That’s not a call to passivity. That’s a call to battle. And this isn’t some anti-feminist message. It’s a message of men stepping up and leading – it’s not about women at all!

But modern church culture often paints leadership as something to be avoided—almost as if strong, decisive, biblically grounded men are a threat. The result? Men either become spiritually passive, letting their families drift, or they leave the Church entirely, looking for purpose elsewhere. Meanwhile, women are left carrying the spiritual burden in the home, a weight they were never meant to bear alone.

It’s Time for the Church to Call Men Back

Men don’t need a watered-down, sentimental version of Christianity. They need the full gospel—the one that calls them to fight the good fight (1 Timothy 6:12, ESV), to become the protectors and providers God designed them to be(Ephesians 5:25, ESV), and to build a legacy of faith (Joshua 24:15, ESV).

The Church has to stop apologizing for biblical masculinity. It has to stop catering exclusively to emotional appeals while ignoring the deep, primal call in a man’s soul to stand, fight, and lead. Men need challenge, mission, and a brotherhood that sharpens them like iron (Proverbs 27:17, ESV). Even the wording we use needs to change. Men’s retreat? The biblical picture of a man is one that does not retreat! Not sure I have a good answer for an alternative but men’s retreats should not be a thing!

It’s time to reclaim a dangerous Christianity—one that calls men to risksacrifice, and live for something bigger than themselves. Because that’s the gospel. And if we get this right, we won’t just keep men in the Church—we’ll raise up a generation of warriors for Christ. And a side benefit, we’ll have a surplus of leaders willing to storm the gates of hell with the only message that can change the world.

« Older posts

© 2025 derrickhurst.org

Theme by Anders NorenUp ↑