living for eternity today

Category: Leadership (Page 9 of 20)

What Don’t You Know?

There’s an old saying you don’t know what you don’t know. And man is that ever true! I have to be honest there are likely more things that I miss in life than I even realize because I take so many things for granted!

Today I was setting out some logo apparel at the church I serve. Super nice gear if I do say so myself! But if it had been up to me, this never would have happened. I kind of got in a rut with the logo wear for church. It all kind of looked the same. Simple logo on the left chest. Short sleeve polo shirt. Maybe a zip up fleece but that’s about it.

One day a young lady at church pretty much told me I didn’t know what people really wanted. And I could not be happier! I have to say her eye was exactly what was needed. While I was a bit shocked when she said something, I couldn’t be happier that she did.

I got so close to the same old design stuff that I didn’t even realize that it wasn’t something that was of any interest to anyone other than me! I didn’t know what I didn’t know. But am I ever glad that I was able to hear this one!

What don’t you know? A good practice in life is to gather feedback from those around you about what they see and how they’re experiencing things. It’s super easy to get so wrapped up in life that you miss the trees for the sake of the forest.

It’s good to surround yourself with people whose opinions you value. There are three types of people I find helpful to have on a sounding board kind of team.

People beyond you. These are the people who’ve been there, done that. They can speak from experience. They can tell you what worked or didn’t work for them and even better why it did/didn’t worked. Regularly check with these one or two people you value to tell them what they see in you. This might be hard and it takes some vulnerability but it’s super essential!

People beside you. These are colleagues and friends, sometimes family as well. They are the ones who interact with you on a regular basis. Really important here, these are not direct reports. These are peers and people who spend a great deal of time walking alongside you. They know your habits and can spot when something is a bit off. They can often tell when you’re not acting like yourself, even when you can’t even tell it!

People behind you. These are the direct report kind of evaluations. These people see how you interact and often are the recipients of your off days more than anyone else. They can sense when you are not focusing on what matters or when you’re really in the zone. These types of conversations might be hard at first but in time you can build the relationship where they feel comfortable to honestly tell you what you’re not seeing.

You don’t know what you don’t know, so ask a bunch of questions. Invite feedback from people whose opinion you’ll actually listen to! And then listen to it. Adjust when you need to adjust. Give away permission and authority where you need to give it away. And you never know, you might end up with a pretty well designed hoodie out of it!

The Good Life of Horror

Many will never know but others will never forget. Many will only see pictures while others have the images branded in their minds for all of time. There is a generation being raised that know very little about the evil that lurks in plain sight. But others can’t get rid of the emotions.

Today many will pause to remember the events of September 11, 2001. The world kind of stopped that day for many of us. Classes canceled. Flights grounded. Police and military were everywhere and NO ONE had a problem with it. First responders were loved and admired. Service men and women were held in high esteem. Race. Creed. Color. Gender. Political persuasion didn’t matter. We were one people. One nation. One nation on her knees.

Then we stood. Like we always do. We dug deep. Found our resolve and placed our feet on the solid ground of our ancestors. We leaned forward in a fighting stance and raised our arms with fists clenched. We weren’t going to take this one laying down. We had to do something. Anything. Nothing was not an option.

But what has happened as the images of the horror faded has been disheartening yet predictable. Even though we said we’d never forget. Even though we add special banners to our social media for this 24 hour day. Even though we light the sky and fly the flags and even pause for a few seconds that day to remember, I’m not convince that we don’t really remember.

If we remembered, I mean really remembered, then things would be different. We’d have that same respect for local authorities we had on September 12th. If we remembered, we’d be able to see beyond color and gender and side of the aisle. If we really remembered the world would be a different place.

Sometimes it’s good to have a moment of horror hit. Sometimes it can be good to suffer the fear and heartache we suffered that late summer day. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. I don’t ever want to feel the emptiness of that moment again, but I sure wouldn’t mind to live the good life of horror again. That was a day I could live over and over again.

The Necessity Of The Hunter

Yellowstone National Park is a beautiful place. My family took our last long vacation out to Yellowstone and the surrounding area. We absolutely loved everything about it. The scenery was amazing. There was wildlife everywhere. The trees were huge and fields filled with green grasses and other natural elements. The rivers were beautifully bubbling streams of sparkling water. But it didn’t always used to be that way.

In the early 1990s things in the park didn’t look quite like this. The elk had nearly overpopulated the park. The grass was more sparse. The trees were stripped of bark. The rivers and streams weren’t as clean. All of it because there were too many elk populating the park. But why were there so many elk? Good question! I’m glad you asked.

It all started in the late 1800s and early 1900s when it was open season on the gray wolf. By the end of the 1920s the gray wolf was eradicated from the park altogether. Some thought this was going to be helpful. From not having to worry about visitors to the park region being attacked by a wolf to giving some freedom for the elk to run free, getting rid of the wolf seemed the right thing to do at the time. But little did they know at the time, removing the hunter from the park would have drastic effects on the entire ecosystem of Yellowstone.

Then in 1995 a truck carrying eight gray wolves came into the park and released a controlled population back into the system. What followed could only be hoped for…the park returned to a thriving ecosystem. It turns out hunter are necessary for a thriving system. Predators, while doing bad things in the eyes of some, are necessary to create an atmosphere where all can thrive.

This truth transfers beyond wolves in a national park. As a matter of fact, I think in our lives in general we need predators. We need those people who contradict us and challenge us. Those who seemingly are out to get us because they keep us on our toes.

Just like bringing the wolves back to Yellowstone balanced the ecosystem and brought the elk population back in check which made the rivers run cleaner – so also having some of these challenges in our lives brings our lives back on track as well.

We like to eliminate the problems and run from adversity, but perhaps we should embrace some of the challenges in life a little more intentionally. Perhaps we should give thanks for the circumstances in our lives that make us more alert. Paul tells us to rejoice in all things and to even have joy in our trials. This is very likely the reason why.

In the church we like to complain when things don’t go right, when the government oversteps a line, when we feel like being a Christian is hard. But living a life without challenges is a lot like Yellowstone without wolves. We become complacent and think the world owes us something. We dry up and start caring less about the world around us. Eventually the streams of life get all muddy with troubles of the world and we forget what’s most important.

I’ve heard so many lately say that it’s getting harder and harder to be a pastor in the world. Oddly enough Jesus never told us it would be easy. As a matter of fact if it is easy, I tend to believe that we’re probably not doing something right. Jesus told us that we’ll have struggles in this life. He said the world will try to do to his followers what they did to him. Sure sounds like we should be expecting trouble of some sort doesn’t it?

Look. I know it’s no fun being pursued by wolves. I’ve been in my fair share of situations where someone has thought I was prey. But when we have friendships where people turn on us, jobs where coworkers don’t like us, scenarios where we’re not fully embraced – those moments shape us into who we’re supposed to be.

My advice. Don’t necessarily pray for wolves to surround you. But I would thank God for the times when you are pursued by a predator because predators aren’t always evil. Sometimes predators are necessary to help you live a more alert, focused, and dynamic life.

Is This Burnout?

There is a huge epidemic floating around the world right now that has people burning out in their jobs and lives. But is burn out really burn out? Or is it something else?

I recently listened to a man who is very much in tune with the mental well being of people today. And he draws an interesting distinction between burn out and something he calls stress out. To be honest, I’ve never heard of stress out before but his explanation got me thinking a bit.

Burn out for most people is when they just feel tired and unable to push through something. It’s like everything in life has them down. But burnout is actually deeper than that. Burnout squashes a person’s soul. It makes them stoic. Emotionless. They don’t have the capacity for caring anymore. They are carrying a weight that has them buckling at the knees constantly.

Please note it’s not that a person in burnout doesn’t care. It’s that they are unable to care. They do not have the ability to care. They might want to care but they just simply can’t. Their heart has grown numb. Their mental and emotional self has been so burned by the stresses of life that they just can’t feel anymore.

Burnout is the constant feeling of failure which has broken a person’s ability to engage emotionally in the tasks in front of them. Burnout is very real and it can be very dangerous. The best way to handle a situation where burnout is likely is to have very clear expectations. Remember, burnout has to do with feeling like a failure at nearly everything. Clarifying expectations makes burnout a less likely outcome. If you’re in a scenario where there are not clear expectations, do yourself a favor and find a way to clarify what’s expected of you to keep you from burning out. Burnout leads someone to feel not like they failed at something but like they are a failure.

But there’s another side to this. Not everyone who feels pulled in too many directions, like a failure and just plain exhausted is actually in burnout. This speaker called it stress out. The idea of carrying too much stress is that you can’t keep up. You’re running too many things at the same time. Your role exceeds your character. Living with too much stress is dangerous.

Stress in and of itself is not a bad thing. Actually there is level of stress that can be healthy. Healthy stress forces us to be and do things we otherwise would never be and do. But too much stress for too long can be dangerous. As a matter of fact, too much stress carried for too long leads a person to lead a frenzied life that never slows down. The longer we carry high levels of stress the higher the levels of cortisol in our body. Extremely elevated levels of cortisol can lead to major health concerns. Everything from blood sugar problems to heart trouble to weight gain to massive agitation and mood swings are all a result of elevated levels of cortisol in the body.

Stress can be a dangerous animal when it comes to our overall health and well being. But severe stress is not the same as burnout. While burnout makes us unable to care, elevated stress for long periods of time can cause us to care too much about things we normally wouldn’t think matter. Stress out tends to trigger snap reactions in life.

A person living in a stress filled environment will be unable to manage change or handle simple questions. Changes, no matter how small, are seen as another weight added to their life. While questions are seen as complete challenges to their authority.

If you’re struggling with burnout or stress, it’s critically important to find someone to help. Find someone to talk to. Talk to a friend or colleague. See a therapist. Seek help from a counselor. These are not signs of weakness! They are the most important things you can do to protect your mental, emotional, relational and spiritual well being. (It can even protect your physical well being too!)

We all have different capacities for what we can handle, so please don’t compare yourself to someone else. Both of these are real. Both are dangerous if left unattended or unaddressed.

Changing Times

The times we’re living right now are times many of us never thought we’d see. The speed of cultural shift is so drastic it’s almost dizzying! Look at how fast things have morphed in the past 3-5 years. Some blame the pandemic others blow the thing off like it never happened. I think a better assessment is that it happened, whether we like it or not, and that it accelerated our lives to a speed many of us are not comfortable with. It’s even been said that our society jumped forward about 10 years in the span of 2 years time.

Changing times are terrifying. We don’t like change often because we can’t control it. Something being out of control is not fun. I’m often branded a control freak. But that’s not totally accurate. I tend to embrace change pretty easily and change is out of control. I would say I have a need to be informed about what’s happening so I can be prepared to address challenges that arise. That’s not control it’s desiring information.

Recently the national version of the church body to which I belong made some pretty bold moves. And not bold in a good way necessarily. Honestly I think they’re bold in a way that shows some lack of faith and a bit of cowardice.

I know this is going to probably push someone’s buttons. While that is not the intent, if it does get people having a dialogue instead of unilaterally legislating how we handle change in the world then so be it. I’ll push away!

There are two matters that have really stood out to me as I’ve participated virtually in this conference: as a church body we really have a trust issue and control is pretty important.

There are a couple topics that make this super evident to me. One of which is the desire to focus on one method for raising up pastors in the church body. While I admittedly did not hear anyone say that only pastors going through a residential seminary training process are real and everyone else is fake or lesser, that sure seems to be the tenor of the conversation. I am willing to be wrong here.

The matter from my perspective is one of control. While I do believe it is important that anyone who is rightly called as a pastor within this church body know what we believe, teach and confess. And while I also know that it is important to have diligent study of the Bible and our confessional structure, I also believe wholeheartedly that there is more than one way to get that same result.

Just like I was able to participate in the conference virtually and virtual education methods are numerous and getting more user friendly, having a strong virtual element to the raising up of pastors would be fantastic. I have men in the congregation I serve who would make phenomenal pastors but they just can’t uproot their families or quit their jobs. So alas that’s one less pastoral candidate our church body has in circulation.

The unwillingness to release a little control over the structure of how things are taught (not what is taught but how and where) is really disheartening. I honestly am shocked when I see how the apostles led the churches in the book of Acts. They were uneducated men. They didn’t uproot their families to go off to an institution for a 4 year stint to learn something. They were able to learn while they lived their daily lives.

Are there some trade offs? Yes there are but doing the same thing the same way will not yield a higher result. It just won’t work that way. We should still cherish the traditional route to ministry that has served us well for many years! But releasing a little control back to the parish pastors and working alongside them to raise up and train men for works of ministry sounds kind of Book of Acts to me. Keep high standards. Work on curriculum or teaching points/methods. But leave the how and where to the local guys with regular checkins from the structures that already exist.

But then there’s the whole trust issue. Do we trust that the men in the field are going to steward their gifts properly? I think this is a huge struggle as well. I mean most of them were trained in the residential program that is being held up as the only way to do it. And yet we don’t seem to trust them to be able to teach other men to do the same job? Seems to show a lack of trust in our own teaching! One of the signs of a great teaching is that the student is able to teach the material to someone else.

Look I get it. None of this is going to be easy. But it doesn’t have to be impossible either. The tighter we hold to this method as the only method, the more we’re going to lose. But why is it so hard for us to let go a little?

Change is hard because it leaves things out of control for a period of time. I’m not one of those change everything just because we can kind of guys but we need to know what can change and what can’t change. Changing nothing is not an option. It just isn’t possible. If we can manage change well, we can better manage the chaos that’s so often associated with change.

I think a long and hard conversation needs to be had about where God wants his church to go. Not where we want it to stay. It’s time to make some bold moves for the sake of the kingdom. Repent where we’ve made mistakes. But keep moving and advancing the kingdom. It’s only then that we will see how weak hell’s gates truly are (as long as we’re sitting here those gates hold up pretty darn well).

The times are changing and while the message can’t change – the methods are going to have to change.

Optometrist or Artist?

Kind of a weird title. Totally get it. But I think sometimes we act like one of these when we should be the other. In dealing with truth matters, conflict issues, and frankly many conversations in life we tend to tell what we want people to see more than what truly is there. Let me explain.

I love going to the eye doctor. Not a lot of people say that I’m sure. And perhaps I like going because it’s a time I can hear the doc tell me how great my eyesight is. I’m one of those people who have been given the uncanny ability to see really well without corrective lenses. Actually I’m the only one in my house with strong enough eye sight to not need glasses or contacts.

When you go to the eye doctor and sit in her magic chair, she pulls the little mechanical goggles in front of your face. Then she asks you to look at the letter graph on the wall and read what’s there. Her job is to help you see what’s right there in front of you – just more clearly. She isn’t supposed to help you see something creative or cool. Just black letters on a white background. No more. No less.

An artist on the other hand has a different job. Their job is to help you see something from their perspective, something that may or may not even be there. The job of an artist isn’t to clarify your sight or even highlight reality. Their job is to paint you a picture from their view point. Inevitably they’ll help you see colors, shapes, or elements of something that you might have missed through shading and colors and even exaggeration of sizes.

I think in our communication we have to determine which approach we’re going to use. As a pastor of a church, my job isn’t to paint you a picture of something that isn’t there. It’s not to color something in a particular way that makes you think it’s pretty or beautiful. My job is not to tell you what you want to see. Being a pastor is not like being an artist.

Being a pastor is far more like being an optometrist than an artist. I don’t get to tell you what you should see. I tell you what’s there that you might not be able to see properly.

This part of my job is not fun at times. Telling a friend that their lifestyle isn’t in line with their confession of faith has lost me more than a few friends. But I firmly believe in caring about someone too much to leave them in a potentially bad place is worth the risk. To be honest,if I had to do it all over – the times I’ve been an optometrist (especially the ones that backfired and caused someone to be angry with me) I would definitely do them again.

I can’t paint a pretty picture of someone who is living in a dangerous place spiritually or in a bad relational setting or in a hypocritical lifestyle. None of it is good, healthy or beneficial to anyone!

The point is, if you want an artist to draw you a picture of how good life is and sugar coat things in life so you feel better then I guess I’m not your guy. But if you want an honest, and at times blunt, assessment of what is visible from your actions then I’d gladly walk alongside you as an optometrist who lets you see the difference between view “a” and “b”.

Here’s to seeing more clearly!

Decision Made, Now What?

Throughout the past couple of weeks we’ve navigated making hard decisions and how to weigh your options to make the best decision possible. We’ve looked at how other people react and what questions you answer. And we did all of it based on the idea of a pastor receiving a call to a new church. Although many of the points are relatable across situations.

Today we look at what happens next? I mean what happens after you make your decision and make it public? What do you do? How do you do it?

The short answer is you move forward. Whichever direction you choose, whether it’s staying where you are or making a necessary shift, you just go and don’t look back.

The temptation will be in some cases to play the whole what if game? You know the what if I made the other decision? What if I chose the other option? What if I went through the other door? But that game won’t really benefit you at all. It won’t do you any good to sit and ponder over and over again something that just wasn’t meant to be.

The best thing to do now that you’ve made your decision is to move ahead with whatever transition plan you’ve established. If you’re staying then you need to transition back to the vision of the group you’re leading, or cast a new one. If you’re leaving, then make the necessary shifts to get packed and move on.

Do not linger in this process as it only makes things harder. Especially if you’re leaving a place where you are fairly well connected, you want to make sure to take time for healthy farewells but make it swift.

In my case, I decided that it was clear that I needed to stay where I am. That decision really didn’t have anything to do with the other church. It was all about what I really believed was still here in front of me. But as I made the decision, I alerted the other church and all the other necessary people. I made my announcement. We prayed for the new friends I made throughout this process. And now we get back to work. I won’t forget the people I encountered along the way. And I won’t stop praying for them, but I know that I am not the one God called to be their pastor.

The long and short of things is that we move on. We hit the ground and get back to work. Cherish the steps along the path. Hold the friendships close. But there is something in front of you here that needs done. Now’s the time to get to it.

Now as you’re moving forward, look for the next decision that needs made and you start the process all over again using what you learned about yourself in this process.

Have We Lost Our Voice?

Your voice is something that’s easily taken for granted. I mean how often do we stop and think wow I’m sure glad I have my voice today? It’s not until we get laryngitis or a sore throat that we start to think about the sound of our voice. It’s generally not until it’s going away, or even gone, that we start to realize the importance of our voice. But I think we might be losing our voice.

For generations in our history, we’ve had to use our voices. From yelling out the front door that dinner is ready to talking to the clerk at the grocery, we had to use our voices. We had to speak and listen. Conversations were the norm for our society.

But something happened in the not too distant past. We let our voice grow quiet. And I fear some have altogether lost their voice.

It started with the telegraph then the radio and television, but quickly moved on to computers and phones and now all things virtual. You can live much of your life totally on the grid and yet not interact with another human vocally. I get it though. Some days we get that whole I can’t people today feeling. (I actually have a shirt with that quote.)

But what happens when we give up our voice?

When we give up our voice, we let someone speak for us. I remember when my grandparents were struggling with end of life issues related to Alzheimer’s disease. My mom had to be their voice. When one person gives up or loses their voice, someone else speaks for them. And if you don’t trust that person, it can be dangerous!

We’ve given up our voice in so many ways. I watch kids and the tendency to gravitate toward their phones or devices instead of interacting with real, live humans in front of them. I watch as someone would rather send a text or email instead of making a call or stopping in for a visit. When we give up, or lose our voice someone speaks for us and it often doesn’t end well. Even if the voice people hear is an assumption they’ve created!

If you look around you can see it everywhere. Parents have given up their voices to let the schools raise their children. Men and women have given up their voices at the polls because they think their voice won’t count. Even in churches we see people forfeiting their voices to praise teams or choirs.

As a pastor it’s so hard to look at the members of the church and see so many with arms folded and lips held tight. You have a voice! Use it! Or someone will speak for you. And if you don’t speak up, you can’t be mad that the outcome isn’t what you want.

We are in a really important time in history. There will never be another today. The decisions we make today will affect our kids forever. The way we use, or don’t use, our voices in these moments will set in motion the path for the future of society. I know it sounds heavy but it is!

It’s time to stand up for what we believe in. Disagree if you must but do it in an agreeable fashion. Respect other opinions but voice your own. We need to claim the voice we’ve been given and speak. And it has to start today.

No one can take your voice as long as you’re using it. So use it!

Am I Done?

Ok…so it’s pretty common knowledge that I am a pastor. And it’s also probably not a secret that this is all I really know how to do – be a pastor that is. Something that’s no secret but maybe not known by everyone is that I recently received a call to serve as pastor of another church in a suburb of Detroit.

I understand that the idea of receiving a call isn’t a normal concept so here’s a quick explanation. In the corporate world there are head hunters who pretty much go around seeking people perfect for the opening in a specific company. They have a list of skills and items that need done and their job is to find the right person to get those jobs done.

Well in a call it’s kind of like that but not…all at the same time. In church world, at least in the church body to which I belong, when a church is in need of a pastor they gather a team of people to evaluate the church’s needs, strengths, and weaknesses. Then they match that with pastors around the church body who have interests and skills where the church has needs. And they extend an offer for that position to the appropriate candidate.

Where this is different than a typical corporate head hunter though is that we believe this position is really coming from God through the local church. So when a church needs a pastor they should be spending considerable time praying through the options available to them and extending a call based on where they feel God leading them to go.

This brings me to the title for this post – am I done? This is the question the pastor must ask when he receives a call to a new location. And this is the very question I’ve been wresting with for the past couple of weeks.

Have I taken the church I’m serving as far as I am able to take them? Am I hindering their forward momentum? Am I preventing them from growing both wider in their reach and deeper in their faith? Have I outstayed my welcome? Ok not really welcome but outstayed my capacity for leadership and discipling of the people.

This is a hard question to be certain. And the really hard part is removing emotions from the mix. It would be easy to say I have friends here so I’m not going anywhere. But that’s not really what the call is about. Actually that’s what makes the call of a pastor different from the hiring of a manger or employee. We don’t, or shouldn’t, stay or go because of friends or extended family. Sure we take others into consideration, but the decision is based on is God done with me here.

Throughout this process I’ve spent far more time listening than talking. I’ve asked far more questions of myself, the people around me, and my family than I have provided answers. I’ve called on men and women with whom I’ve surrounded myself in an effort to hear God’s voice through the wise counsel around me.

It’s not an easy process! Considering and praying through a call does NOT mean anything negative about the people I work with and serve daily. It just means that I need to be open to the possibility that God has something else in mind…something better for His kingdom. For me that’s the whole point of this discernment process. Is God done with me here? What is the best option for His Kingdom?

So for now we wrestle with the question am I done here. I now wait in prayer that God provides a clear answer and the comfort and confidence to boldly step in whichever direction he has for me to step.

Can you help me?

Getting volunteers to commit to something is getting more challenging in several parts of our society. I’m not sure why it is but it seems people are more apprehensive about serving while at the same time demanding more places to be able to serve. It’s kind of confusing to be honest.

The issue is however that we need volunteers. We need places and spaces to serve and lend a hand. It’s really the only thing that keeps us from being egotistical and arrogant turds. The more we focus on ourselves the less we focus on others and the more self centered we become. It’s a nasty cycle to say the least.

There is a problem however. In the last post I talked about two filters I use when I look at the volunteerism crisis in churches and non profits. You can read that here. In this post, I promised to give you a way that really seems to work amazingly well when it comes to asking for volunteers. And to make matters even better, it’s super easy! At least it should be easy.

It all starts with why.

When I go about asking for volunteers, I only use two sets of parameters. The first is why you and the second is what I’m asking you to do. It’s really that simple. But it all starts with why.

Before you go into what you want them to do, you have to know who they are. This means that you have to have relationships with the people around you. Know their likes and dislikes, passions and fears. You don’t have to know everything about them but just observe. Are they good with kids? Do they freak out when a child walks in the room? Are they color blind? Are they great with grammar? Or are they unable to spell? Can they sing or are they generous? What about hospitality or compassion?

These are the things we have to look for in the people around us. When we know what gifts people have, it becomes far easier to help them find a place to plug in. So the starting point is to answer a simple question. What do you see in this person that makes you think they’d be right for this job?

When you can answer that question with 3-5 concrete examples, then you’re in the right place. Be very careful however that this isn’t some stupid love fest just to butter someone up and then whack them with an if you really care about the church you’ll serve bunch of nonsense. We’re not talking bait and switch. This is a genuine, honest assessment of who they are from your perspective. So lead with those 3-5 concrete examples of what you see in them.

Would you be interested?

The second step is the ask. So after you’ve told them what you see in them and how they interact with others. After you’ve given them all the reasons that you feel they are a wonderful blessing to your organization, then you ask them if they’d prayerfully consider putting those wonderful gifts to use in this specific area.

You will never get them to plug in if you don’t just ask them. But the beauty here is that once you have gone the distance of really thinking through who they are, asking will be so much easier. It’s a natural fit if you’ve done the first step right.

Is no still an option? Absolutely! And you have to be ok with that reality. But the amazing part of this approach is that when you start by identifying what you see in the other person, even if they say no they’ve been blessed by your comments. Even a no is a work of blessing in their life as they leave the conversation filled by the words you shared.

There’s no golden ticket to getting people engaged in a next level manner. We just need to work diligently at building relationships with the people we serve, communicating what we see in them, and walking alongside them as they grow and deepen their commitment.

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