Have you ever been at a party where they had a confetti cannon? Those things make a mess! The bits of paper and glittery items go everywhere. It makes a mess and gets on literally everything. Sometimes I think we live our lives kind of like confetti cannons. We just kind of throw our efforts in just about any direction possible and see what sticks. We disburse our efforts in a manner that, if we’re honest, has very little impact.
We do a lot of things in an ok manner and do nothing really well. If you’ve ever heard the phrase Jack of all trades, master of none or I know just enough to be dangerous. These are statements that indicate we have a confetti gun approach to life. While there’s nothing inherently wrong with knowing a little about a lot of things, it does keep us from making a deep and lasting impact.
At a conference years ago a speaker said something that just kind of stuck with me. He said, Do for one what you wish you could do for everyone. That phrase is branded in my mind. There are so many people that we want to help. So many groups we want to support. So many hobbies we want to learn. But what if we sink some intentional time into one or two things and do them for the long haul?
The problem with trying to help everyone or do everything is that we either make no real impact when we try to do it all or we get so overwhelmed that we end up dropping everything and doing nothing. But if we can focus on just one or two things and do them well, helping one or two people/groups intentionally for a longer duration of time, then we can make a bigger impact in the long run.
So the challenge is to determine what to stop doing, what to start doing, and what to keep doing. That’s a task we can’t cover in a blog post. There are some questions and some exercises you can do to figure out where you should focus your efforts. But to get you started make a list of all the things your confetti cannon is shooting. Estimate the time or effort each one needs. Then rate them honestly by how your skills and interests match up with each of them. That is a good place to start when it comes to narrowing your focus and making a lasting impact.
This week we will gather with friends and family for fun, fireworks and lots of good food. We will bake in the sun. We’ll complain about the heat. We’ll spend time in the pool. Maybe we’ll set off some high altitude explosives. I’m not sure what you’ll do to celebrate this weekend known as Independence Day, but make it a safe celebration. Here are a couple of things to ponder before you go blowing crap up and getting roasted by your backyard pool.
What is this day all about?
It’s no secret that I’ve always been a fairly patriotic kind of guy. I’ve always stood for the National Anthem, put my hand on my heart when saying the Pledge of Allegiance, respected or at least politely remained quite toward those in office regardless of how I feel about them personally. But as I grow older and realize more and more about myself and the things we have in our lives as Americans, I can’t help but stand more firm in my stance on the power and amazing gift of the freedom we have as men and women in this country.
But what exactly is freedom?
Freedom is not making everyone do what you want the way you want it done. That’s dictatorship. Freedom isn’t giving everyone the same ends, meaning the same outcomes in life. Freedom isn’t erasing the bad moments to make the us feel better. Freedom isn’t even leveling the playing field. And freedom wasn’t cheap and it shouldn’t be to us either.
Freedom is giving everyone the a place on the game board, not ensuring that everyone wins. It’s giving people resources to run the race not giving them a trophy just for showing up. Freedom is a gift wrapped in the sacrifices of countless men and women across time and space. It by far is one of the most costly free things we’ll experience. There is only one thing more costly than our freedom as Americans and that’s the love of a gracious God.
Freedom is a gift that looks like a smile on a child’s face when they are adopted by a couple who can’t have children. Freedom is the sound of fireworks in sky instead of bombs in our backyard. Freedom is best realized when everyone works to raise the ceiling instead of pointing at the basement.
In our 21st Century modern world we’ve become basement dwellers instead of ceiling lifters. It was for the sake of freedom that men and women from varying backgrounds came together to lift the ceiling of oppression and bondage. It was in the name of freedom that soldiers stood at the ready to allow us the chance to have a backyard barbecue. And it should be in the name of freedom that we as Americans come together to raise the ceiling and in so doing help to lift those crushed under the weight of economic, health and relational challenges.
Freedom doesn’t mean we all end in the same place. That’s like saying every football game has two winners. Why keep score?! Why even play?! Freedom is being able to put two teams on the field at the same time, not always equal teams but teams that battle back and forth making both better.
Back to the beginning…
In short, freedom isn’t about being able to do anything we want or even letting everyone have the same treatment. It’s about being given the chance to play, work, live. There will always be some who are more talented, gifted, popular, welcomed, rich than you are, but there will always be some who are less of these things as well. Freedom is being given the ability to operate inside the boundaries. Wisdom is knowing where the boundaries are. Compassion and love are realizing that differences are valuable and seeing worth in someone who might very well be different than you.
In short, today you can be free become someone chose not to be free in a moment of time. Today you can celebrate where you are in life but do it without belittling someone in the process. Today you can celebrate the fact that while you may not be where you want in life, you are able to live, breathe, eat, work and play with some pretty wide open boundaries.
I’m going to drop a song here at the end that shows why you have the freedoms you have. This song is special to me for many reasons, mostly because my son shared this with me and said this is one of the reasons he chose the path he chose.
Be well. Stay safe. And thank Mr. Red, White, and Blue for the things you can do today.
Contentment is a really good trait but it can also be a very dangerous one. Growing up I was taught to be content with what I had. I wouldn’t have everything everyone else had so I had to be thankful for what I had and not always want more. I was a very blessed child growing up and for that matter still am very blessed. But it’s challenging sometimes to be content. We see something our neighbor has and want one just like it or even bigger. We see the newest release of the iPhone and we line up for hours to get it. There are all sorts of things that are bigger and seemingly better than what we have which makes being content difficult to say the least!
But is there ever a time when being content is a bad thing?
I will go out on a limb and say that yes there are times when contentment is not only not good but actually destructive.
You see contentment can often lead to a slippery slope toward complacency. I’ve seen it more times than I can count in the lives of people around me and in my own life for that matter. We get comfortable in our station or situation so we sit. Then we grow content with how things are. We might see something that could be done better but why fix it if it’s not broken we think. So our comfort has lead to contentment that eventually can breed complacency.
As a leader in a few different areas of life responsible for helping people move forward in commitments and convictions, I will tell you that contentment is a killer for motivation. Until the desire to change becomes greater than the comfort of staying nothing happens. Nothing grows. Nothing has a chance of getting better.
So often the fear of changing provides a breeding ground for a very toxic form of contentment. We fear moving in a new direction afraid of what might be around the corner. We like the whole thing mapped out for us, but what if the journey is more important than the destination.
If we remain content with where we are and let excuses fill our reasons for inaction, then we cannot complain when the problem persists. I have a hard time patiently waiting when there appears to be a clear course of action and the one with the power to decide just drags his/her feet. When we are content to let things stay stagnant for fear of hurting someone or not knowing what’s next, we do a great disservice to those we lead.
You don’t need to have all the answers. You don’t even need to know how it’s fully going to end. But you can’t just sit still. Sitting still to continually mull over new possibilities is just demonstrating your contentment and comfort. You don’t have to cross the pond all in one step but if you don’t make at least one step you will never get across the water.
Lately I’ve been wrestling with a spirit of contentment and a growing sense of what I call holy discontent. It’s that feeling in the pit of my stomach that says We can do more. We should do more. Ok fine I just have to do more. I’m at a point in certain aspects of life where I’m just tired of waiting for that more to fall into my lap. I’ve done the whole God if you want me to move then show me. But I never can really discern if what just happened was God answering or not so I don’t move. We can’t just stand still. More doesn’t happen when we’re sitting on our backsides.
I want to encourage you to start moving. Take a step. Any step really. You don’t have to start running. But one after another take a step. Slowly you’ll see whether the endeavor is going to be worthwhile, fruitful and blessed or if it’s a colossal waist of time. If there is no fruit from your actions then be willing to abandon the forward movement to step in a different direction. If one step naturally leads to another open door, then you just might be onto something. But it all starts with just a little step. A step that ends contentment for adventure, excitement, and possibility.
So the long and short is that contentment is good when it’s kept in its place. Be content with who God made you and with the things you have. But there are areas of our lives that God calls us to live with reckless abandon. Throw caution to the wind. Do something today that could yield dividends tomorrow. Remember it’s not about making an impact on the world. It’s about making an impact on one person and changing their world. And it all starts with a little holy discontent.
Well I don’t know what things are like where you live but in our neck of the woods we were just told that things will return to a more open feeling the first part of June. What an amazing relief that will be for so many! Many are starting to dabble in life as some form of normal but they’re just hesitant with any restrictions still in place.
Many pastors and church leaders have been struggling to see how they can gather their people, serve their communities and establish a sense of rhythm and community with their neighbors. But the question is where do we start?
I by no means am an expert in this matter but I do spend a lot of time reading trends and studying demographics and having conversations with neighbors and community members. I’ve compiled a list of things that could be simple starts to get you and your friends/neighbors reengaging as a community again. Take any, all or none of it. And even for those of you who are not believers in Jesus, you can still do many of these in the context of your relationships too!
Walk to get the mail and say hello to your neighbors.
Walk your pet at the same time of day to meet neighbors regularly.
Sit on your front porch while your child plays outside.
Have a cookout on the patio.
If invited, attend!
Gather neighbors for a fire in the fire pit.
Do an open meal night with a few neighbors.
Gather to watch sports together.
Have a _____ cook-off around your block.
If you like your neighbor’s landscaping, tell them.
Go for walks or runs with your neighbors.
Coach a child’s sports team.
The point of each of these is simple – find space and time to gather with and reconnect with those around you. Pick one or two or come up with your own. This summer in the church I serve as pastor we’re going to bring back our summer parties. We just need to get people back together and celebrate our life lived in fellowship and love for one another. Share what you do. Share your new ideas or creative thoughts. I’d love to hear from you!
Lion’s are one my favorite animals, aside from Koala bears but that’s a post for a different time. They are one of only four different species of cat who can actually roar. And roar they do! A lion’s roar can be heard for up to five miles in the right conditions. It’s pretty spectacular to say the least. A lion will roar for 3 basic purposes. And each of those reasons can teach us something about our own lives and how we should use our own voice.
Direction
A lion will roar to indicate where the pride is and where they should be headed. A lion will sound its roar to alert everyone around where it is. It’s their way of saying stay away this is my territory. They don’t merely roar to alert any potential threats to their presence. It’s often used to tell the pride where to go for safe passage or lush grounds or where food can be found. The roar of a lion can be used as a mapping system of sorts.
I personally think that we as humans, and I’m going to speak directly to men because I am one but this likely applies to women as well, we have lost our roar. We have failed to roar for the safety and provision and direction of our families. We’ve stopped speaking up for our wives and children. We’ve let culture and politics and education systems remove our voice. We’ve grown passively quiet and in the process let our children, wives and families wander aimlessly without direction or protection.
Roaring doesn’t mean yelling. It means using your God-given voice to alert your family to danger, which means you have to be present. It means to use your voice to call out direction to those around you. Not as a dictator but as someone who’s looking out for those around you. When we start to use our voice again, we’ll speak life into our family and provide direction to those around us.
Power
They roar to demonstrate their power and ability. The roar of a lion is so powerful that it echoes through the jungle. You can hear it for miles in every direction. They do this to demonstrate that they are in charge. No pride of lions is led by a quiet lion. No lion will ever abdicate his position in the pride to someone else because he doesn’t like using his voice.
Again I focus on men but this is equal for all, we’ve let our voices grow eerily silent. Maybe it’s because we’re tired but I fear it’s because too many men, and women, don’t think their voice matters or have been belittled too many times to let their voices be heard. Men I know that it’s not easy some days. I know that we don’t know whether we should hold the door for the woman entering behind us at a store because we don’t know how they’re going to react. I know that it’s hard to compliment someone because we’re not sure how they’ll take it. But you have a voice. It’s time to use it.
Your voice isn’t just the vocal box in your body that allows you to speak words others can hear. Your voice is your actions and lifestyle. Using your voice isn’t about yelling to demonstrate dictatorial power. It’s about letting people know who you are what you stand for. Using your voice is about standing in the gaps in society to speak up for those whose voice isn’t being heard. You voice is about lifting others up not putting others down.
The church collectively has grown just as silent as the individuals in it. We need to roar. Jesus is the lion of the tribe of Judah. When he roared from the cross, the graves split open. What would happen if we would roar with His power and His truth? Could we split the death markers in our own culture?
Protection
The lion is the king of the jungle. A good king not only has power but it also is in charge of protecting those in his care. The Disney movie, Lion King, is a great image of what happens when a king goes off the rails and stops using his power for the benefit of the people. If you’re not familiar with the movie, a bad lion – Scar – sides with the less than desirable hyenas and they convert the lush pride land to the barren dead land in very short time. He doesn’t try to protect the rest of the animals, rather he looks out for himself.
I think we can learn a lot from the way Scar leads the lions and how he treats the rest of the jungle. He doesn’t take his position seriously. He uses the other lions for his personal benefit. He abandons the weaker. He expects the world to bow down to him even though he hasn’t earned it. He abandons his voice for a moment of self pleasure.
We run the risk of doing the very same thing. When we don’t flex our voice boxes and let our roar come out, we end up leaning into our selfish ambitions and personal pride moments. It’s time for men and women to stand up and speak. We need to speak for what we believe to be true, not putting someone down to make ourselves feel better but honestly, rightly, boldly, unapologetically speaking for what is right. We need to confidently and clearly speak to defend the things we love. We need to speak for those who cannot speak for themselves. We need to speak for our future while accounting for our past and present. All in all we need to roar and make those roars heard far and wide. It’s time to protect our pride land or Scar will soon cripple what we value most.
I want to start by saying this will likely be unpopular with some of you and I respect your opinion. However this is something I am starting to believe more and more firmly as I watch my own home, church, community, country and the world as a whole. To put it short, the biggest challenge facing the world right now is not political, medical or financial. It’s about family.
Everything in our world right now is messed up and upside down and it has nothing to do with who’s in the White House or how imbalanced the sides of the aisle are currently. It has nothing to do with unemployment or national debt. The problems that we are facing by and large come from the breakdown and devaluing of the family unit and men it’s our fault.
Now before you go getting all upset and crankified hear me out.
Men have neglected their responsibility, and it’s killing families which in turn kills communities which in turn kills cultures which in turn is messing up the whole world in which we live.
If we want to really right the ship we’re all sailing on we’ll focus on raising men who know how to be men. We’ll raise a man who stays with his wife even when he disagrees with her. We’ll teach a man to be there for his family, not just abandon them or throw a paycheck at them. We’ll teach a man to claim responsibility for failures and mistakes. We talk about abortion but why not focus on teach the boys in our culture to keep their pants on! We talk about getting handouts from the government but why not teach boys to get jobs and stick with them!
The problem isn’t about jobs or politics or even race. It’s that we as a society have let men get off the hook with being pansies. We’ve let them stay boys in a world that needs men. We’ve let them run off and abandon their wife and kids. All this does is teach the next generation that this is the way you can treat a woman. And the cycle continues and spirals.
If we want a movement in our world that will really impact an entire nation and that balances presumed racial hate and elevates women, then we need to start teaching men how to be men. When men reach the top of our potential, we’re better able to lift the ceiling so that our wife and children can go farther and higher than we were able to go.
We’ll never grow as a society on the shoulders of weak men. We’ll never conquer the hate in our world be belittling anyone. You don’t empower one people group by putting another group down.
Men we haven’t lived lives worth following. We haven’t been worthy of the respect we so badly want from those around us. We’ve been weak and at time pathetic. It’s time to man up and raise the bar.
This weekend I challenged a group of guys to grow as men. I challenged them to journey with me in a study of what a man is supposed to be. I challenged them to gather in groups of three to work together and challenged each other to grow as strong men who take responsibility for their actions. Men you aren’t going to do it alone. Find a band of brothers to sharpen you. Find the group who can hold you accountable. Push each other to be present for your family. Raise you sons to be strong men of faith willing to serve those around you. It’s time we as men take our God-given responsibility seriously and man up before there aren’t any men left to stand.
It’s been a while since I’ve been in a crowded place. No not because of covid but because I really don’t do crowds that much to be honest. But I remember the last time I was at Disney with my family, the ride attendant wanted everyone to move forward and fill all available space. Those words made me cringe. I don’t want to fill all available space. I didn’t want the sweaty man behind me pressing in closer to me. I didn’t want to lose any opportunity for air to flow through the hot line as we awaited entry on the ride.
We need to leave some room to breathe.
Maybe you’re not a ride person or have never been to a busy park like that. But what about reading. Have you ever read a book that had such tiny print and the margins were so small that there was literally no extra room on the page? Or how about when you take notes in class, were you the kind of person who filled the page in every possible direction and filled all available space?
We need to leave margin.
This is a really important principle that we need to really take to heart. Margin is critical. When we pack too many people into a small space and leave no extra room (aka margin), we can feel claustrophobic and have a hard time breathing. It can even cause a panic attack in some people.
The same is true in our schedules. If we don’t leave some margin in our lives, we end up pushing too close to the edges of our ability and have no room for emergencies or small changes in our schedules.
I find in my life, there are seasons when I run from place to place and fill my nights with meetings and games for the kids and projects around the house. When these things happen I have so little margin that I tend to miss some key moments in life. Or I miss just simple opportunities that pop up unannounced.
For a season I worked two full time jobs. I was gone all the time. From sun up to sun down and then after all went to bed I was on the go preparing for the next thing. I missed parties and outings and even some holidays. I had no margin. My neighbors and friends and family didn’t know who I was because I was never around. I missed being able to have a beverage with my neighbors around their fire pit. I wasn’t there to help a friend through a challenging time. I even missed some key moments in my children’s lives.
Living with no margin means we miss out on far too much important, spontaneous stuff in life. I’d like to challenge you to evaluate your schedule and be honest. What needs to go? What needs to stay? Who can do some of the things on your calendar that you really don’t need to do? What are the things that only you can do? And what are the things that someone else is just as qualified and just as capable of doing?
See if you can create some margin in your life. You’ll be glad you did.
I remember a little over four years ago there was a whole movement in the United States with people who were upset about the results of the 2016 election that started a not my president social media campaign. It was laughable to say the least. They weren’t going to change an election with a social media campaign. Not sure what they were trying to prove to be honest. But it was indicative of a deeper rooted issue that was present in our culture. In 2021 it’s been given the name cancel culture.
The basic principle of cancel culture is that when something doesn’t go how we want it to go, we cancel it. Now canceling comes in a variety of forms. We delete someone from social media and act as if they never existed. We change the narrative of someone’s story to line up with what fits our lives best. We demonize the opposing person to make them the total enemy just because they have a different view point.
There are tons of ways that this is done in our world today. And it goes both ways, so let’s not get our panties all in a wad here. This is a two sided game that’s played out in life, so stop pointing fingers at the “other side” for doing this all the time. Although it always looks worse from our perspective when the opposition does it.
But is there a better way? Is there a better way to handle it when someone disagrees with us or opposes our view point?
Yes! There is! It’s called being an adult. Goodness we act like a bunch of preschoolers who get our feelings hurt. Grow up!
Ok that wasn’t helpful at all. Sorry about that. Seriously, there is a better way to handle this for sure. Canceling is not the right answer. Ever. Here are a few steps that we can take to prevent ourselves from canceling someone that has a different outlook than we have.
Listen before replying.
One of the biggest issues that I find exists in this whole cancel culture world is that we make assumptions based on emotion not fact. We hear the part of what someone says and form our opinion before we know the whole story. All too often our communication is predominately in short written forms like text messages or social media. Well you can’t get all of your thoughts out in a text message and you have no idea what a person really is thinking when you read that text. So instead of asking what a person means, we tend to jump to our emotional response. We make assumptions. ASSumptions are not good by the way. They make you look, well let’s just say bad.
Respond don’t react.
Following closely on the heals of listening is having a measured response. It’s super easy to give the gut reaction to something but let’s be honest. That’s usually not the best way of doing things is it?
I think of wha happens when someone, even jokingly, slaps me in the back. Not to be hurtful or anything just a hit on the back harder than a gentle pat. Well, something inside me flips when that happens. My reaction is generally not that great. I will typically spin around with fist clenched ready to show you in no uncertain terms that I don’t like that. I know it’s an overreaction but that’s what reactions are – they are not well thought out.
So when we respond instead of react, we take time to process the information that someone gives us. We listen to the words but also read the nonverbal cues. When we’ve put all of the information together and calmed ourselves down from any emotional vigor, we can respond in a more level-headed way.
Remove Emotion.
Another key to having a civil conversation with someone who differs from you is to remove your emotionally keyed up self from the equation. We all too often come into a situation with all sorts of preconceived ideas, emotions from other parts of life, bad day at work, scared of financial trouble, kids aren’t listening, friends don’t treat us the same way, all sorts of things that pile up and then someone disagrees and WHACK! We rapidly turn around and pummel the person who thinks red is a better color than blue.
When we’re in a situation where we disagree with someone else, it can be helpful to step away for a predetermined amount of time to cool off. Say something like Hey I’m not in a good place right now, so I’m going to go for 10 minutes to cool off and then we can talk more. But come back in 10 minutes and be cooled off!
The two problems we have with this most often are that we don’t take time to cool off when we know it’s the right thing to do. And secondly, we don’t set a return time. If we don’t set a return time, it comes across like we’re ditching the conversation. Saying that you need to go cool off is so ambiguous and has the appearance that you’re never coming back and just avoiding the problem.
So step away and cool off. Then come back and with a level head talk gently about it.
Lower your voice.
One of my favorite things about parenting that I learned way too late was the power of a whisper. When we’re heated up and someone isn’t listening to us and we feel attacked or like we need to get a point across, we tend to raise our voice and yell. But when we raise our voice, the other person backs away.
If we want to get the situation to calm down and draw them close, we need to lower our voice (and in turn lower our blood pressure). Then we will force ourselves to more calmly engage in conversation.
It’s ok to not see things the same way.
The last part of this is to realize that we don’t need to agree with everyone. It’s ok to disagree. Disagreement doesn’t mean war. It just means that I can respect your point of view but I expect you to do the same for mine.
None of these alone are silver bullet approaches to diffusing conflict. But all of them put together will go a long way toward deescalating some of the trivial back biting we find prevalent in our society and relationships these days.
Ok so let me just throw this out there. I am 100% totally and completely over what covid has done to the lives of so many people. We’ve all been impacted by either the virus or the way it was handled. Some have tragically lost their lives due to complications of the illness. Others were slowed down for a time because they got it. Still others lost jobs, homes, loved ones, livelihoods, and the ability to just function in normal life.
I’ve heard so many times I want things to go back to normal. But do we really? I mean do we really want life to just magically snap back into place like a rubber band after being stretched. If we really just one day snap back to life as it was in 2019, what was the purpose of all of the struggle of 2020? If we just go back to the glory days of the past, then we essentially wasted what looks to be close to two years of our lives. No one wants to waste their life away!
So I want to encourage you to see this portion of life not simply as an interruption to your normal routine but as a disruption to the flow of how things were. An interruption is temporary and allows things to return to how they were previously. It’s like a blip on a radar then it’s gone. A disruption is a roadblock that forces us to take a different path. Sometimes a disruption can be negative but other times it can breathe new life into a situation.
Are there things about this whole new way of living that aren’t convenient or even good for that matter? Absolutely! Masks and distance are not how God created us. We were created to live in community. So much of communication is nonverbal and masks completely mess that up! I’ve had to repeat myself more times than I care to admit because someone can’t hear my clearly through a mask. Distance is not healthy either. Isolation easily leads to depression and can be deadly. The suicide rates are skyrocketing not just in our country but around the world.
I guess when we look at this way of living as an interruption we just want to get it over and go back to our comfort zone. But that’s just a tad selfish if you ask me. If our lives are more about what make us comfortable than what makes life better for others, then we have our priorities all screwed up.
But if we look at the past year or so as a disruption, we’re allowed to look back and learn form the past so that we can be more intentional moving forward. Intentional. That’s a power word. The focus of intentionality is that we live our lives with an intended purpose. Going back to the way things were means our purpose was already fulfilled, but that’s just not true. Living for the past gets us nowhere and it’s exhausting.
Do you find yourself more anxious, upset, tired or irritable than normal? Chances are you’re longing for the past. You’re trying to run down the up escalator. It’s exhausting to try to fight every day for something over which you have no control. Don’t give up. But change perspective. Be intentional about your day. Look at the person you are called to be. Chances are the disruptions of the past 12 months have very little impact on the person God created you to be. It’s time to pivot and make the necessary adjustments to serve those around you best.
In his book Good to Great, Jim Collins says that the greatest enemy of great is good. We settle for good all the time. Good isn’t bad. It’s good afterall. But is there something better than good waiting right around the corner? Is the good thing of yesterday that we want back, keeping us from the great thing we can experience tomorrow?
I’ve done a lot of thinking about this lately. As a pastor I look at what this disruption has brought about. I’ve met so many new people through this time that I never would have met had we not been in this mess. I’ve connected with new faces at church. I’ve had conversations with people at the gym that I’ve never talked to before. We’ve expanded our reach albeit virtually to many more than we ever would have. The way we were doing things before was good. I do miss seeing some of the people around church that we haven’t seen in months. And one day I hope they’re back again!
But I also see the countless opportunities that God has given me by making me slow down and spend more intentional time with family. Reorganize my calendar to better reflect my priorities. Value the expressions on people’s faces that I often took for granted. There are so many great things that I have learned through this pandemic by just changing perspective.
So while I want some things to change, I don’t want them to go back to normal because normal isn’t the life we’re supposed to life!
When I was child I had a telescope. I put it in my window and looked up at the stars. I positioned the tripod on my tall dresser and pointed the one end out the window and up at the sky. I positioned my eye close to the smaller end and looked up at the stars. I was amazed at how close things were! When used properly a telescope is a truly amazing tool!
But one day for grins and giggles I turned it around and looked at the stars backwards. I rotated the telescope 360 degrees and looked again. The stars were unrecognizable. They were smaller than without a telescope. When used properly the telescope can really help us gain a healthy perspective on space but when turned around it’s pretty much pointless.
The same is true for how we view events in life. It’s easy to use the events in our lives as turn around points and reflect on how things used to be. But that’s no more healthy than using a telescope backwards. Here’s an example…
The year 2020 probably caught you off guard a bit. Going into the year we were all doing the corny Perfect Vision in 2020 or seeing clearly in 2020, but then February and March hit. To say that March came in like a lion would be an understatement! All of our plans for Easter and summer were pretty much trash by the end of March.
Many people in my circle took time to throw pity parties of how things used to be, myself included. We looked at Easter plans and VBS plans and all the thought and effort that went into preplanning much of our calendar year. So it was healthy to reflect for a second. Pausing to regain focus is never a bad thing. For us that lasted for about 3-4 weeks. We temporarily canceled all of our plans for the foreseeable future. No egg hunt, no vacation bible school, no in person worship, no gatherings, no family get togethers, no vacations and the list went on and on.
After we pumped the breaks on all of our plans and took a few weeks to catch our breath, we came to the conclusion that we might be doing this whole thing all wrong. We were looking at the way things were currently and complaining about the inconvenience of it all. We were dreaming about the good old days of four weeks ago. We were using the telescope to look backward.
We weren’t looking forward to life as we now know it. We couldn’t get past the inconvenience of the new hurdles. We longed for better days, but for so many better days looked a lot like the good ole days of the past. But that’s just not productive.
Now don’t get me wrong. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with remembering and celebrating the events of the past. There’s nothing wrong with learning from mistakes and changing our approach to life. But we can’t keep looking over our shoulder at how life used to be. You don’t drive that way. You don’t walk that way. You don’t look through a telescope that way. You can’t do life that way either.
So we quickly and without much notice, took a hard and abrupt turn. We planted our foot firm on what we knew was non-negotiable in our area of life. We know family was important and community was critical. We knew that there had to be a way to use this moment in life to establish a new set of rhythms. While we didn’t know exactly what the future held, and for that matter still don’t have a clue, we knew we had to stop looking backward and start looking forward.
As you go through life changing and traumatic moments, take time to pause for healing. But don’t stay paused for too long. Use the trauma, the set back, the interruption as a means to help you reevaluate what’s in front of you. Don’t look through the lens of the best days are behind us or getting back to how we used to do it. Use the disruption to truly change course and set a new path to get you to an even better promised future.
